What lies within the Heart of Darkness
by mabelreid
Summary: Sequel to How did this happen to me JJ has a happy family and life with Spencer and Hope, then a women is killed in the woods of Pennsylvania. Now JJ must face the horrifying truth of her fear of the woods. JJReid Possible spoilers for all three seasons
1. Nightmares

_A/n this follows about three years after the events in "How did this happen to me. All feedback is appreciated._

_Disclaimer: I own my own original characters and nothing else. No copyright infringement is intended._

_**Nightmares**_

She was running hard, stumbling over rocks and twigs that littered the pathway through the woods. The moon was racing her as she ran, flashing white gold through the trees. Her face was continually whipped by tree branches as she forgot to push them aside.

Her breath was coming in gasps, and the stitch in her side hurt so badly she could barely stay on her feet, but she had to keep running. She had to tell someone. Fear made her strong, it pushed her on through pain of breathing and the reaching and stinging branches on her face and bare arms.

She tripped and fell flat, the pain of the skin erasing from her knees buried in the rush of adrenaline that made her get back to her feet and move forward. She had to move forward. She could feel something trickling down her legs, and she supposed it was blood from the cuts and scrapes, but her mind screamed for her to run faster.

The trees were beginning to thin and she saw headlights moving on the road in front of her. She heard the engine of the next car coming closer. If she could get to the road, she would be safe. Her breathing was heaving in and out of her chest, and it was the only thing she heard above the slap and pound of her shoes on the hard ground below her feet.

She was going to make it. The engine of the car was coming closer and she could hear the snarl of the gears changing, as the driver shifted down on the winding road. The opening in the trees was coming closer, and if she could just reach it, and get out into the open, she would be okay. He wasn't back there he wasn't following her. He couldn't be back there. She had to save herself and tell everyone what had happened.

The heaviness in her legs was beginning to slow her, but it was okay, she was nearly to the edge of the trees. The moon looked down on her and its rays lit her path as though sent by a guardian angel from above. She had been brave. She had gotten free and left that terrible place. She'd survived and a triumphant surge of joy made her legs move faster again. She reached the tree line and…

Another branch tangled in her hair and yanked her back, she could only grunt in surprise. She tried to reach up and untangle her hair, but her arms wouldn't move. It was then that her brain succeeded in telling her that someone had grabbed her, not a branch. The arms held her to the body behind her and she felt the hot breath of her pursuer on her cheek.

"No… you can't be here. Please… let me go!" She rasped her voice was so hoarse with crying and screaming she could hardly get the words to pass by her lips.

"Naughty girl," He whispered in her ear. "You know what happens to naughty girls." He yanked her back, just beyond the edge of the trees. The car she had been listening to flew by, its lights penetrating to where she'd stood, but not far enough to expose them.

"No!" Her scream was only a whisper as his arms tightened further around her, crushing into her ribs and making her moan in pain. Adrenaline wouldn't save her now.

"You'll pay just like all the others." He dragged her back into the trees and fell on her. Her voice was freed and she screamed and screamed. A knife flashed into the night silhouetted on the sky before curving down to her chest.

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He was sitting in the afternoon sun, watching the golden rays fall on the beautiful face of his little girl. She was so lovely, just like her mother. Her blond hair was shoulder length, and the sun worshipped it like a supplicant worships his goddess. Her blue eyes were large, doe eyed, and dark as the depths of the ocean.

"Dada… plays wif me." The two year old asked, toddling over to her father.

"Of course princess… what would you like to play?" He picked her up and walked over to the bench in the backyard.

The grass was green and lush under his feet. He noticed that it needed to be cut. He shrugged and smiled. His wife would be getting on him to cut it, but that was okay. He would do it another day. It was time to play with his daughter.

The bench had been built by Morgan just after the house was purchased in a new development of Arlington Virginia. It sat beneath a small arch that was painted white, and blue morning glory flowers climbed over it. There was a flowering Dogwood tree behind the arch, its white flowers swaying gently in the perfumed breeze. Morgan had told JJ that it was a sweetheart bench. There were more colorful flowers surrounding the arch and the stone path he'd laid himself, much to Morgan's surprise. Learning to lay stone had somehow calmed a part of him that had been in turmoil since Tobias Henkel had tried to destroy him. It appealed to his innate sense of order and symmetry.

"Dada… me want tick!" She reached up to play with his hair. Her little hands were soft on his head, and all the troubles of the day before fell away like ice melting and sliding from a tree branch.

"Okay… that was a dumb question. You always want magic tricks." He put her on the bench next to him and leaned over to get something from next to the arch. He kept one hand behind his back and Hope grinned up at him. JJ was always there in her little face, but that morning her smile was so much like JJ's that his heart almost broke with happiness.

"Dada do tick" His daughter demanded. Yep… she was her mother's daughter, forthright, outgoing and good natured.

"Yes… baby daddy will do the trick." He pulled his hand out from behind his back and showed her the red rose he'd plucked from the bush next to the bench. She laughed and clapped. His long fingered hands moved with a grace that he never saw himself, but that everyone around him noticed and delighted in.

He made the rose appear from behind her ear and used it to tickle her chin. She laughed and grabbed at his nose. He was looking down at her face when her expression changed; her face screwed up and went red. She began to scream, but it wasn't the kind of scream he'd ever heard from her when angry or upset.

"Hope… what's wrong honey." His voice seemed to be coming from far away.

She screamed and now her voice was older, it sounded so familiar, but he couldn't place it. "Baby girl… what's wrong." He grabbed her up in his arms, suddenly it was icy cold. He looked up and saw that the sun was gone.

There were clouds overhead that were black and pewter around the edges. The wind was beginning to pick up and blow hard. It was growing even colder, and goose bumps jumped out on his arms. Something was very wrong. He jumped to his feet and began to run to the house with his screaming daughter. She was terrified and he could feel the pounding of her little heart against his chest.

Thunder cracked from overhead and lightning flashed. He ran across the lawn, and now it was gold, and dry, and dead under his feet. Rain began to fall in levels he'd never seen before and he tried to shield Hope from it with his own body, but they were both drenched by the time he reached the back porch. Thunder sounded again and Hope was crying.

"Dada… Go bye-bye,"

Her little face was approaching purple, and he could see that she was having trouble drawing breath. He yanked open the door, and ran to the living room where he laid his soaking wet daughter on the couch.

"Dada…" He could barley hear her over the rain thumping on the roof of the house. She closed her eyes and stopped breathing.

He could still hear the screaming of the woman, it was a woman he realized, even as his own breath began to hitch.

"Hope… Wake up!" He couldn't remember CPR. How could he not remember CPR?

"Hope…"

"Spencer… Help me!" JJ was yelling. Now he knew it was her voice he'd heard. He looked to the doorway where the voice was issuing, then back to Hope. Her lips were blue, and her eyes were open and staring at him accusingly.

"Help me Spencer… please."

He couldn't go he had to remember CPR for Hope. She couldn't die. He wouldn't allow it to happen, but JJ was in trouble too.

"**Spencer!" **

He shot up out of sleep and heard the rain thumping on the roof. Thunder cracked loudly over head and he jumped in surprise. The storm must have incorporated itself into his dream. That's all it is, he tried to tell himself, even though his heart was still racing. He felt the bed shift and the sheet that had covered his body was pulling away. He turned to see that JJ was tossing and turning in the bed next to him. The sheets that were pulled off him, had wrapped around her like a mummy's shroud. Then she screamed, long and loud. It was the scream he'd heard in his dream. It was all a dream he said to himself again, just a dream. Hope was asleep in her crib and just fine. Then JJ screamed again and he tried desperately to shake her awake.

"JJ… Wake up baby!" His heart was trying to throw itself out of his chest. He just wanted to be sure that JJ and Hope were okay. "Come on sweetheart… wake up… please!" He begged.

Her eyes finally flew open and stared up into his. "Spence…" She struggled out of the sheets that had wound around her slender body, and jumped into his arms. She was trembling all over.

"Honey… what -"

"It was him!" She sobbed. "Why won't he leave me alone?" She pulled back and looked up at him with the large blue eyes that he loved.

"Shh… it's okay!"

"No it's not… I was so scared. He was coming after me again." She went back into his arms and put her head on his chest. Their hearts beat fast for a long time as they held onto each other. Finally both their hearts slowed, and synchronized to a slow and steady rhythm that always existed between them.

"Why won't he leave me alone?" She asked into his chest.

He was going to answer her when Hope began to cry. His heart began to speed up again. What if that terrible dream wasn't a dream, and someone or something was hurting her. He untangled himself from JJ's arms and got out of bed. He grabbed his robe and rushed out of the room while putting it on.

"Spence… What's wrong baby?"

She' gotten out of bed and was running to catch up with him. He ignored her and hurried down the hallway to Hope's nursery. The door was open about halfway. He didn't like to leave her with a closed door. What if he didn't hear her at night? JJ teased him unmercifully about this, but he didn't care. She was his to protect and it didn't matter that she didn't come from his DNA; he loved her like he'd never loved anyone else in his life.

She was standing up in her crib, and it struck him how big she was getting. She was nearly three, and it was time to get her a little bed to sleep in. She saw him enter the room, the light at his back and she held out her little arms.

"Dada…" she gasped. He picked her up and JJ came up beside him. "Hey pretty girl… what's wrong?" she asked their daughter.

"Mama… I scared." Large tears were running down her red and blotchy face. She sniffed and laid her head on Spencer's shoulder.

"Oh sweetie… it's okay." She laid a hand on Hope's forehead and sighed with relief when she felt that it was cool.

"She's okay." She said to Reid who smiled down at his daughter.

"Mama and Daddy are here. You're okay now." He stroked a hand over her silky hair and Hope stuck her thumb in her mouth.

It had taken them sometime to break her from sucking her thumb, but if storm was frightening her, he wasn't going to make her stop. In fact, he kind of wanted to curl up in a corner and suck on his thumb. It was okay though, they were all awake and they were all okay.

He started to lift her back into the crib, but she began to cry again. "No Dada… go wif Dada and Mama…"

"Honey… its okay I promise." He told her.

She shook her head and wailed. "Go wif Dada pwease!"

He looked helplessly at his wife and she nodded her head. "I think staying together is the best thing to do. We're all a little shook up. We'll worry about bad precedent later." She always knew what he was thinking. He was the one that was supposed to be the profiler, but he couldn't ever fool her.

"Okay baby girl… let's go to sleep."

Hope smiled through her tears and clasped him tighter around his neck. They took her back to their room and eventually all three of them got back to sleep.

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The sheriff met up with Officer Baker at the edge of Allegheny National Park. It was eleven am and his man had said that is was a bad one.

"What have we got Baker?"

The man in front of him had been on the force for ten years. He was no rookie, but his face was green and he was sweating profusely.

"I hope you didn't contaminate the crime scene." He said testily. "Show me what they found." He gestured to the two hikers who were huddled together. The woman was sobbing into the man's shoulder and the man looked like he'd swallowed a fly.

"T-they were w-walking the trail and they f-found her just lying in the m-middle of the path."

"Pull yourself together Baker." He let the younger man lead him to the body. The flies were already gathered in buzzing swarms over what was left of the woman in front of him. The smell was incredible. He'd been a detective for twenty five years, but he'd only ever seen anything like this once before.

"God Damn it!" He exclaimed, while looking at her. He bent closer, ignoring the choking sound of his officer trying to keep down whatever was left in his stomach. He looked at the pattern of the wounds on her face and the fact that her hands were gone, and his hands clenched into fists at his sides. He got up from the crouch he had adopted and turned to Baker.

"Do something useful and get the FBI on the phone. We need the BAU out here now!"


	2. A brutal new case

_A/n hey everyone, my sincere thanks to all who've embraced this story and reviewed it or added it to their alerts. _

_Disclaimer: Marienville Pennsylvannia is a real place, everything else is out of my imagination. I don't own anything recognizable and yada yada yada._

_**A brutal new case **_

Six am came early the next morning for Spencer. At first, he was confused to turn over and discover Hope in bed with him and his wife. She was curled up on her side and her thumb was tucked in her mouth. He made sure she was breathing, and then felt like a stupid and overprotective father for checking. He was supposed to be over this stage of first time fatherhood.

He remembered when Hope had come home from the hospital; he'd gotten up in the middle of the night just to check on her. He did it every night for a week and drove JJ crazy.

"Hey babe…" Her voice broke through his thoughts.

"Hi…" He leaned over his daughter and kissed her.

"She's okay," His wife assured him, squeezing his upper arm and looking down at their sleeping daughter.

"I'm doing it again, aren't I?"

"Yes… but I get it Spence. We had a hard night last night." She continued to stroke her hand up and down his shoulder. Her touch could always calm the storms of his heart. She was the only one besides Hope that didn't make him uncomfortable when they touched him.

"I thought I was over that part of her life, but I was so scared last night. I've never had a dream like that and it's so strange that you were having a bad dream too. The chances of that happening are so high that… well lets just say it's weird. There was this study they did in Central America in the late nineteen seventies with group dreaming but -"

"Baby… can we hear about that later?" JJ asked with a small smile.

"What… oh yeah… sorry, I guess that's one of the hazards of being married to me." He smirked and then pouted when she whacked him on the head.

"Come on… we gotta get going."

"You just love getting up and finding something for the team to do, don't you?" He rolled over and slipped out of bed. JJ pulled on her robe and leaned over to pick up Hope. His daughter jerked awake when JJ touched her. She flipped over onto her back. Her hair was mussed, but she was smiling when she looked up at JJ.

"Hello my beauty," JJ said softly gathering the girl up in her arms. Spencer walked around the bed and grinned at the little girl.

She rubbed her eyes and yawned a little bit. "Mama hi," she said sleepily.

"Good morning Princess." Reid greeted her with a kiss to the cheek and she giggled. She held out her arms to him, "Dada!"

He took her from JJ and went to her bedroom. He got her changed and dressed in jeans and a little purple tee shirt. The jeans had butterflies embroidered on one leg and the tee shirt had flowers and little butterflies around the scoop collar. Hope's favorite color was purple and it seemed that she had inherited her mother's love of butterflies.

Her nursery room was painted yellow, but there were purple lilacs and violets around the borders painted near the ceiling and around the door. The sheets on her crib were purple with more butterflies. The furniture was blond wood and there was a rocker glider in one corner.

"Dada feed," She demanded while he put little purple socks on her feet.

"Yes… baby." He lifted her to the floor, and she ran out the door with him hot on her heels to the kitchen.

He got the coffee maker going and then began making applesauce pancakes, little ones for Hope and a stack of bigger ones for himself and JJ.

He was pouring out coffee and putting a couple of little pancakes out for Hope, when JJ came into the kitchen, dressed for the day. They would go into the office and if there was a case, it was Reid's turn to stay home and JJ would be out in the field. They had been taking turns like this since Hope was born and it was working out very well.

"So… what's on the schedule for today?" He asked her, sitting down in a chair across the table from JJ, who was sitting next to Hope.

"I didn't have anything urgent on my desk last night. I think it'll be a day of consults for you guys, unless something big happens."

"Good… We can use a break." He took a sip of his first cup of coffee for the day and sighed happily.

"You know… A girl could get jealous watching the way you drink your coffee." JJ informed him a little irritably.

Hope giggled at her mother's tone and shoved a bite of pancake JJ had cut up for her into her mouth. Reid only smiled at both of them.

"That's just crazy… being jealous of a cup of coffee." Reid put down the cup and started on the pancakes in front of him.

"You never look at me the way you look at a pot of fresh brewed coffee." She told him, drinking from the glass of cranberry juice in front of her.

"That's not true. If coffee were suddenly banned, I'd get over it." He lied through his teeth while cutting into another pancake.

"Right… Spencer Reid you can't lie to save your life." JJ accused him.

JJ's phone rang and Reid sighed with relief when she moved out of the kitchen to take the call. He noticed that Hope was done with her pancakes so he took her to the sink and cleaned her face and hands. He took her bib off, and he was very happy to see that her clothes were still clean.

"Go find mama princess… daddy has to take a shower." He swatted her gently on the bottom and she toddled off to the living room.

He was just buttoning his shirt when JJ came into the bedroom. "That was Aunt Sarah. She wants us to come to Pennsylvania for Memorial Day weekend. I told her that we'd try, but couldn't promise anything."

"I'll bet she wasn't happy with that answer." He sat on the edge of the bed and pulled on a dark blue sock.

JJ sat next to him and grabbed her shoes. "I'm just so tired of the same old arguments. She hates my job and she doesn't like you. I can't understand it. My aunt likes everyone." She stood up and went to the jewelry box.

"She blames me for what happened in Georgia." He said, while placing a stripped sock on his other foot. JJ had never told her aunt about the rape and Hope's true parentage, but she knew about their encounter with Tobias Henkel.

"How can you say that, you're the one that was hurt? You're the one that developed a drug addiction because of what he did. The only thing that happened to me was getting bit by a dog and watching you die on the internet."

Reid went to her and put his hands on her shoulders. She was putting a pair of small pearl earrings in her ears. She looked at him in the small mirror in the lid of the jewelry box.

"Honey… your aunt Sarah cares very much for you and she thinks you're throwing your life away at the FBI. She thinks you should be a reporter on TV, or something more glamorous. When you married me, she lost all hope of that. I think she thinks I brainwashed you into marrying me. She uses Georgia and the nightmares you had afterwards as a way to remind me of how you're wasting your life, and my role in that."

"I'm not wasting my life. I love my job and I love you. I don't care what she says. I'm actually surprised that she's inviting us up for the weekend." She turned and stepped into his arms.

"We'll go. I'm determined to win her over this year." He informed her.

"When did you get so confident?" JJ laughed, and he could hear the tears in her voice.

"When I married you," He kissed the top of her head and let her go. She went around him to the door of the bedroom and saw Hope standing there.

"Mama cry?"

"No baby…" She wiped her eyes and knelt in front of the little girl.

"See… Mama's okay and Daddy's okay and so are Hope." She poked Hope gently in the belly, and the little girl laughed.

"Come on… we're going to be late!" Reid took Hope's hand and followed JJ out of the room.

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"Yes… if you fax the case file to me, I'll get one of the team on it. No… I can't give you a time frame. No… Detective I understand the need for haste, but there are about fifty cases on my desk right now. I have to be fair to the other requests for help. The team may also be called out on something very urgent like child abduction…. No… I'm not trying to be difficult. I'm only saying that the Bureau has limited resources… The sooner you fax that file the sooner I can get it to one of the profilers. Okay… yes… that's fine. Thank you."

She hung up the phone and rubbed at her forehead. It was only ten am and she was already getting a bad headache. When would law enforcement realize that every case was urgent? There were some days she seriously thought about quitting, about leaving all of this to someone else better able to handle it. Some days she thought her aunt was right; she didn't belong in the FBI.

She straightened her shoulder and shook her head. Her aunt was doing it again, trying to get into her head, and make her feel bad for leaving Pennsylvania in the first place. Her aunt would love to have her living back at home with any husband other than Spencer and have a horde of children.

She shook her head again. It was time to concentrate on her job. She put the new request from the Denver PD aside, and picked up another file folder. It was true that this was never ending, but she supposed if she wanted an easy job, she could go just about anywhere else.

See… there she was… thinking about her aunt again and what she'd said that morning. JJ wasn't giving up on her job, it meant too much to her. There was no denying the rush she got, that they all got, from completing a case and catching the un-sub without further harm to innocent people.

There was no sense on dwelling on what could have been, or what might have been, she was happy where she was and wouldn't change her life for any reason. If her aunt couldn't understand, that was her problem. She put the last file on the stack and sighed gratefully.

There was a stack of mail on her desk that needed her attention. She had avoided it ever since getting in. One hand reached out to touch the first envelope of the top of the stack, but drew it back. The hand was trembling and her heart was racing.

"Just do it. There won't be another note in this stack. The first one was just a fluke. It's been three weeks. It's over. Aren't you glad that you didn't panic and tell Spencer? He would've been upset for nothing. Would you have been happy about that?"

No… she wouldn't, she snatched up the pile and began to sort it. Every envelope that fell from the stack made her heart feel lighter and lighter. It was only the usual mail, and interoffice mail that she got every day on her desk. It was over. It had been just a crank. They all got weird mail from time to time from people that were less than stable, and from others that had strange fascinations with what the BAU did.

She placed another envelope on her desk, and there it was, another plain white envelope with her name and the address at Quantico. There was no return address and the postmark was there in DC. All her mail went through screening to detect explosives or biological threats. It was un-opened. Her hands were trembling and sweating again. It was the same handwriting!

_Okay… take a deep breath. Open the envelope carefully and read the contents. You'll see what the bastard has to say and if it's like the first, you'll take it to Hotch and he'll find the son of a bitch. There's no need to tell Spencer yet, it would only upset him. _

JJ picked up her letter opener and lifted the letter up by one corner. She slit the envelope and shook the contents out onto the desk. It was a single piece of white paper, just like the others. She used two pens to open the note, and keep it open and flat on her desk.

The message was very simple and written in black ink: I see you every day. I see the little one every day. Soon we'll be together again and all will be made right!

It was exactly the same thing the first one had said. She should have gone to Hotch. Hadn't she learned anything from the rape? She hadn't taken it seriously, and the day the first one had arrived they'd had a brutal case in Mississippi. The fact of the matter was that she forgot about it!

She looked over the note and the envelope again, and there was no variation in the wording or the spelling, or the handwriting that she could remember. She took out her keys and opened the bottom drawer of her desk. The other note was in a file folder that she picked up. It was time to take all of this to Hotch, and maybe he could tell her that everything would be okay. Her phone rang before she could get up from her desk and she growled in frustration.

"Jareau," She answered curtly.

"Is this Special Agent Jennifer Jareau?" A gravelly and irritated voice asked.

"Yes... Who am I speaking with," she asked in a more subdued and professional tone.

"My name is Sheriff Stern. I'm calling from Marienville Pennsylvania; we're right on the edge of the Allegheny National Forest. We just found a body in the forest that we need your help with."

"Sheriff Stern, the BAU can look at the case, but we need you to fax us a request for our help."

She heard her machine beep just as the words left her mouth. The fax began to spit out paperwork when she glanced up at it.

"I know… I just sent it to you. It's urgent that we get your help Agent Jareau. This woman was found in the same forest, and in the same condition as a spree of murders back in the eighties. I was new to the force at that time, but I'll never forget it. Then after two years of chasing this guy, he suddenly just disappeared. I hoped that he was dead or in jail, but it looks like that's not the case."

"We'll need to look at the original case files." JJ told him, mentally sighing. Her hopes of a quiet day dashed. It was Spencer's turn to stay at the office, and she was going to go home. First her aunt called and now this.

"Fine, we'll have what you need ready for you." The Sheriff said.

"I'll let you know when we're on our way." JJ informed him briskly.

She hung up, grabbed the paperwork from the fax and went to talk to Hotch. She made sure to take the notes she'd received with her. She wasn't leaving Hope behind without telling Hotch and Spencer about them.

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She knocked on the door to Hotch's office. He was just finishing a telephone call. It sounded like Haley. They were divorced now and getting along just well enough to share custody of Jack. Hotch still missed her, JJ knew and only having Jack part time was wearing on him. He hung up the phone and motioned her in.

"Sorry sir…"

"No need… I just wish things were different, that's all. What have you got for us?" He changed the subject, and she let it go without comment while praying again that her marriage to Spencer would last.

She explained what the Pennsylvania authorities had for them, and Hotch raised an eyebrow when she passed over the file she had and he read it.

"So… Sheriff Stern thinks this is the same man."

"Yes… he sounded quite upset."

"I can't say that I blame him, this is quite brutal. Call the team together and we'll get to work on it." He started to get up and she stopped him.

She felt her face getting hot at the prospect of talking to him about the notes she had received. He was going to be upset and she didn't blame him. I was stupid of her to just forget, no matter how bad the case had been.

"Hotch… I have something I need you to look at. I thought the first one might be a crank. We all get strange mail, but I received a second one today." She gave him the notes and he read them. He looked up at her and the only emotion in his eyes was concern. He wasn't angry.

"I know I should have told you when I got the first one, but it was right at the time we went to Mississippi and honestly I forgot, or blocked it out."

"It's okay, but I'm going to have Garcia look at this, and I want Reid to look at the handwriting." Hotch told her.

"I know I have to tell him, but can't we get someone else to look at the note. It directly threatens me and our daughter; he's going to be very upset."

"He's the best we have to analyze psycholinguistics. Rossi could do it, but I need his attention on the case we have and I need your attention as well. Let Reid handle it from here."

"Okay… I'll go tell him. He and Garcia can get on it." JJ promised.

"I'm glad you told me. Go talk to Reid and then we'll get the team together."

"This is going to be another bad one, isn't it?" JJ asked.

"Yeah, it's going to be another bad one." He agreed, but gave her a very rare smile.

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"She hates me Morgan. I don't know what to do about it." Reid told his partner.

"Just go to the party and be yourself. Sooner or later she'll warm up to you. After all, she's a Jareau woman and so far they find you irresistible."

"Very funny Morgan, this is serious."

"What's serious?" JJ said walking up to her husband's desk.

"Nothing… Did you find something for us to do?" Reid wanted to know. He put a file on his desk and gave his wife his full attention.

"Yes… but I have to talk to you first."

He saw the fear and confusion that was making her face pale, and her eyes haunted, and he got to his feet. "Hey… what's wrong? Is something wrong with Hope?" Panic slammed through him like a physical blow.

"No… She's just fine. I have to tell you something. Can you come up to my office?"

He followed her through the noisy bullpen ignoring Morgan's remark that they get a room, and up the stairs to her office.

"Honey… what's wrong, you look terrified and my wife doesn't get scared like that." He kidded and then sobered when she handed him the notes and the envelopes.

He read them and then looked up at her. "Where did these come from?"

"I don't know, I got them here at the office, they were addressed to me."

"We've got serious problems," he told her, dropping the notes to her desk.


	3. I can still do my job

_A/n hey everyone. Once again, thank you all so much for your kind feedback. Also a big shout out to my wonderful beta REIDFANATIC. Thanks for all your help girl. _

_Disclaimer: I own only my own characters, CM is out of my reach, I'm afraid._

_**I can still do my job! **_

"We've got serious problems," he told her, dropping the notes to her desk.

He went to the chair across from her desk and flopped into it. "Why didn't you tell me about this when you got the first note?" He looked up at her and his face was quite calm, which always meant trouble.

JJ stepped across to her chair and sank down on to it. Her natural grace was gone for now. She fiddled with the edge of a file folder on the corner of her desk. "I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to over react."

"JJ I -"

"I got the first note and I honestly thought it was just a prank. We've all gotten mail like this. It's expected in what we do. It was the same day we went to Mississippi. Going after Andrew Stockdale and dealing with the terrible things he did to those little boys just drove it out of my mind. All I could think about were those kids."

Reid picked up a paperclip and began to pull into a straight line thinking hard about how to put what he wanted to say into words. "JJ… it's been nearly four years. You have to let go."

Her face went hard and her dark eyes shut down. "This isn't about Michael Van Cott. I can't believe you're bringing him into this conversation.

"Honey… I don't want to talk about him either, but we have to. You were so upset for so long. You were completely overprotective of Hope for the longest time. Then you were better, and I thought that it was all over, but now this happens and you refuse to deal with it."

She sat back in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest and glared at him. "I am dealing with it. I'm talking to you. I went to Hotch when I got the second communication. I resent you trying to push all of this onto me. All I ever try to do is what's best for our family. I did that by telling you when the second note arrived. I don't know what else you want me to do!"

"I want you to acknowledge that what happened with Van Cott was not your fault. You continue to punish yourself for it and second guess yourself. Yes… you're doing better. No… I don't know what it's like to live with rape, but I do know what it's like to live with the victim of an assault. You're a good woman who cares deeply about the victims we see everyday. You love our daughter and you love me."

"Spence… I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything. You talked to someone, you still volunteer for the Rape Crisis hotline. Let them give you strength. Let your family give you strength. I love you so much. I couldn't bear to lose you. You know that." He got up from his chair and went around her desk. He knelt in front of her and took her hands in his.

"Please don't shut me out. I want to help so much. Please help me to understand."

JJ drew in a shaky breath. It felt like someone was compressing the air from her lungs. It still hurt. After four years, the pain was still there in the back of her mind, like the sting of a bee on her leg. Would it ever go away? The doctor and the other women she volunteered said it would get easier, but she wanted it to go away for ever.

"I'm tired of being afraid and it makes me do things I never did before. I'm sorry if I scared you or didn't seem like I cared. I do care… very much." She squeezed his hands. He extracted one of his hands and used it to life up her face.

"JJ… Look at me, please. I know you're hurting. I know you want the pain and the memories to die and leave you alone, but they won't. I know I can't fix it, but I love you very much."

She began to cry and he put his arms around her waist. She held onto him as tightly as a man would clutch a life ring in the high seas.

"I don't know what to do. I have so many good days where I don't even think about what happened to me. Then I have days that it's a struggle just to function and do my job. I hate it." She was holding on to him so tightly now he was having trouble drawing breath.

"JJ… what's really wrong. I know your holding back?"

She suddenly released him and pushed him away from her. Her eyes were tearful, but she was angrier then he ever seen. "Stop profiling me Spence. You have no idea what you're talking about."

He got very slowly to his feet. He never failed to make her breathless by the grace he showed in the way he moved. He was like a cat when he wasn't nervous and bumping into things.

"I'm not profiling you. Anyone can see the way you keep punishing yourself. Yeah… you don't do it all the time, but you still scourge yourself like its penance for something. You don't have to do penance. You weren't the one that hurt you." He could see she was fast losing patience, but he stood his ground.

"I know that Spence." She spun in her chair and collected the files for the briefing. "I'm not stupid. Just because I don't have a genius IQ, doesn't mean that I can't figure some things out on my own."

He could feel the blood rushing to his face and turning it crimson. "I know that JJ… I just want you to realize that every decision you make can't be based on what happened four years ago."

"I don't and you know it. You stand there and tell me that you don't want to fix everything and yet there you are lecturing me on my decisions. Hotch is waiting for us. We need to get to the briefing." She made to move past him and he grabbed her arm.

"The briefing can wait. We need to talk about this now." He brandished the note in front of her.

"No… we promised Hotch we wouldn't let our personal problems effect the way work with each other." She yanked her arm away from him and started toward the door again.

"JJ please… we need to deal with this now." He pleaded with her, but kept his distance. She had a dangerously angry look in her eye that she reserved for un-subs, and some of her fellow members of the fourth estate.

"Don't push me Reid! In fact, I'm glad I'm going with the team this time. I think we need a couple of days apart. Stay here with Garcia and do your thing with that note, it's what your best at anyway."

She slammed out the door and left him standing there trying to figure out what he'd done to merit her calling him Reid. He found that a review of the conversation didn't enlighten him about her anger. How was it that she was still such a big mystery to him after nearly four years together? He shook his head in confusion and left the office. He'd have to think about it later.

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"We have a murdered woman in Allegheny County Pennsylvania." JJ told the group, with no trace of her fight with Reid on her face. She would show him and the team that she could be a professional. Then Reid hurried in and didn't meet her eyes. Maybe she'd been too rough on him, but it was too late to fix it now.

"Her name is Sandra Sorenson. She was a paralegal for a law firm in Pittsburgh, and had apparently come to Allegheny National Forest for a hike with some friends. It's something they do every year. She was athletic, blond haired and blue eyed. She was on the track team in college and got her degree with a full ride scholarship to Penn State. She's twenty nine years old." They were all looking at the file folders she'd handed them while circling the table and explaining what the police had found in the woods.

"So she's fairly successful young woman, single, intelligent and attractive. It was a blitz attack. The blow to her head looks a few days old. He grabbed her and held her for a few days." Rossi commented while looking through his copy of the file.

"Why are we on this case? Yeah… it's a brutal murder, but I don't see a pattern here." Morgan asked JJ with a perplexed expression.

"This isn't the first victim. I spoke with Sherriff Stern and he claims there was a killer out there in the late eighties that was killing in the very same way. He left his victims in the woods, prominently displayed for someone to find. He thought the guy was dead or in jail."

"If he was doing time, his prints and DNA should be in AFIS. Did we get any hits?" Reid dared to ask his wife.

"No… Sandra Sorenson was raped, but there was no semen found. He wore a condom." He voice quavered a bit, but then she rallied and narrowed her eyes at Morgan who was looking curiously at her and the Reid. The others seemed to be oblivious of the waves of tension coming from the couple, but Morgan felt it.

"He's older, if it is the same man. He's about fifty, very intelligent, careful and precise. He values the ritual of his killing. He has a place he can take them for privacy. What puzzles me is how he got his hands on her in the first place. She wasn't alone in the woods, she had friends there." Hotch said while perusing the file, and tried to ignore the coolness between his liaison and the man he thought of as a brother. They'd work it out, and as long as it didn't interfere with the job, he'd let it go.

"He was watching her. He had to know where the group would be camping and hiking." Emily contributed, watching JJ. He friend looked very unhappy, although you'd never see it in her face. Reid was easier to read, and he was looking sadly at his wife. His face was very pale and his eyes looked even more sunken then usual. There was supposed to be moratorium on profiling her team mates, but she knew that the whole team kept an eye out on the youngest two members.

"The Allegheny National Forest covers five hundred thousand acres. He could have dumped her body anywhere." Reid added.

"He doesn't think he's going to get caught." Rossi said. "He's baiting the police and us. Something big must have happened to make him hide for the last twenty five years."

"I don't think he was hiding. He's probably been active but has found a better hiding place for the victims so they aren't found." Hotch theorized.

"He's not shy, why hide at all. What happened to make him change his ritual for so long?" Emily wondered and Morgan nodded his head in agreement.

"Emily's right we need more information."

"Sherriff Stern's faxing over the details of the other cases as we speak." JJ told Hotch.

"Alright… wheels up in an hour, we need to get in front of this before this guy takes his next victim. JJ I need you on this one, the press is going to go nuts, when they find out one of Pennsylvania's old nightmares is back." Hotch told her while getting to his feet and heading out the door of the conference room

He didn't tell her that she fit the profile of a potential victim. They could use that to their advantage if the un-sub was watching and Hotch was sure he would be.

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Reid wanted to talk to JJ, but she left right after Hotch and he refused to make a scene by going after her through the bull pen. He went to Garcia's office instead. The notes JJ had received were burning a hole in his pocket, and he wanted to know if there was anyone in the DC area that reported this type of harassment.

He knocked on her door and she called out without turning around. "Enter my sanctuary, Oh fortunate one and make your quest for knowledge known!"

"Hey Garcia…" He grabbed the chair next to her station and sat down.

"Hey sugar, what can I do for you?" She smiled at him and then she got a look at his face and her face fell. "What's the matter sweet thing?" She reached over and patted his cheek.

"It's nothing… I just need you to check something out for me." He rummaged in his pocket for the notes. He made his eyes stay on his shoes; Garcia always knew how to read his eyes.

"Looking at the floor won't save you." She took the notes from his hand and scanned them. She put a hand under his chin and lifted his face to her eyes. "Where did these come from?" She indicated the notes.

"They were sent to JJ, the one on top arrived today, and the other one about three weeks ago when we were in Mississippi." He explained.

"Oh… no wonder you're so unhappy, my gorgeous genius." She turned back to her computers and began to coax them into giving up the information she wanted.

"She didn't tell me about the first one. She acted like it wasn't a big deal and it is." He complained.

"Sweetie, you know she doesn't think that. She cares very much about you and Hope. You two are her life."

"I know that, but how am I supposed to know how to treat her when I never know how she's going to react to the big stuff. First she was all overprotective of me and our daughter, and then she goes out of her way to show that something out of the ordinary doesn't bother her."

"She's dealing with a lot; you've got to stop worrying so much. She doesn't want you to worry about her all the time. It would drive anyone crazy, but especially JJ. She's independent. She wants to be taken seriously and when her hotshot FBI agent husband is constantly looking over her shoulder…"

"Okay point taken. Am I really that bad?" He asked her, his face pink and he looked so confused.

"Yes… but I get it. Just let her do what she has to do and stop acting like a man."

"Garcia… I am a man… what do you expect me to do?" He asked looking even more confused.

"Do your job, let her do hers and deal with the emotions she has to deal with. She did the right thing in telling you about this when she felt it was threat. Okay?"

"Alright… I'll back off. Can you run a check and see if there have been any complaints to the police from women that match JJ's description getting any kind of harassing notes, within the last three weeks?"

"Gorgeous, why can't you just once… give me a real challenge," She complained, as her fingers flew over the well known landscape of her computer?

"Sorry… I'll try harder next time." He shot back, but he was smiling a little.

"You're forgiven because you're cute, now get out of here and let me work. I'll call you." She shooed him out.

"I'll be here; it's my turn to stay at the BAU. I've got to arrange to pick up Hope and bring her here anyway. I'm not leaving her alone with Sherrie. She's a good babysitter, but she's not an agent."

"Yeah… okay honey whatever you say."

She wasn't listening so he went to his desk. Hope wasn't leaving his sight till they found this guy!


	4. An apology and a discovery

_A/n hey everyone, here's the next chapter. Thanks to all for your updates or adding this to your alerts. Also many thanks to my beta REIDFANATIC and to CrImInAlMiNdScSiNyFaN87 for her help with my questions about toddlers. _

_Disclaimer: Only the original characters belong to me. No money is made from this story._

_**An apology and a discovery **_

JJ was busily sorting through the old cases Sheriff Stern had sent her. There were faxed copies of pictures of all the victims from more then twenty five years ago. She pulled photos out from the files and looked at them. The girls in the photos had a slight resemblance to JJ, and it was very chilling. Yes… she'd noticed that Hotch had noticed that she fit the profile of the killer's supposed victims. She sighed heavily and put the picture into a file. The fact that the women had blond hair and blue eyes was nothing extraordinary. There are plenty of women that look like that, she told herself.

_That may be true but they were all single women that were successful, or on their way up the ladder of success. Just like you JJ!_

She shivered at the thought and then forced her self to put it out of her mind. She went back to the files and made a few notes of her own. He didn't keep them long. The women were killed two days after they disappeared. They were all found on the fringes of the Allegheny National Forest. The only difference was the last victim. Her name had been Sheila Benjamin. She was single, but she also had a daughter. The child had been five years old when her mother disappeared and the girl had vanished with her. The body of Sheila Benjamin was found five days after her disappearance. The autopsy report showed that she wasn't tortured and raped like the other, just shot in the head and her hands taken.

The little girl had been found wandering in the woods after what must have been only hours after her ordeal, by hunters in the woods. What had that little girl gone through in those hours? JJ shivered just thinking about it. What would she do if someone did that to Hope? She shivered harder. She hugged herself trying to tell herself that Hope would never go through that. She and Spence wouldn't allow it.

_You can't protect her for her whole life. One day she'll be a grown woman out on her own. How will you protect her then? _

She jumped and yelped when someone knocked at the door. Her heart was knocking against her chest. She felt an irrational anger rising up in her chest for her jumpiness. She wasn't high strung. You couldn't be high strung and do this job. Another knock sounded and she smoothed back her hair. She hoped her face didn't show her distress, anyone on the team would know if it did. Her door opened and Spence stuck his head in.

"Ah - is everything okay," He asked unhappiness darkening his lovely eyes?

"Come in," She said, getting up from her desk.

"I - ah… I just wanted to say I'm sorry for the things I said earlier. I just want you and Hope to be safe and…"

She wrapped her arms around his neck and touched her lips to his. "You don't have to be sorry. I was wrong. I didn't want to deal with another threat. I guess I'm a bad mom."

He could feel the way her body was trembling and how her arms tightened around his neck. "I'm sorry JJ I was way too harsh. I just want you to be safe and Hope too. You're a great Mom, she loves you so much."

He pulled her arms from around his neck and led her back over to her chair. His hands were trembling from seeing her so upset. She sat down and he took a chair from across the desk and dragged it over to sit next to her.

"I'm looking into the note and Garcia's helping. I just wanted to come in here before you left and apologize for overreacting. I don't want to go off and leave you mad. We promised we'd never do that to each other." He'd taken her hand again and the warmth of his touch was almost more than she could stand.

"I guess this new case is really affecting me more than I want to admit." She sniffed, trying to keep her emotions under control.

"I know… I noticed the way you kept looking at the photos of the victim. She looks like you, but she isn't you." He tried to be reassuring and she loved him for it.

"I guess the prospect of going into the woods and see how much we look alike is freaking me out a little." She admitted, squeezing his hand.

"Please be careful…"

"I'll be careful. I promise. I'm going to come back to my gorgeous husband and my beautiful little girl… Okay?" She gently extracted her hand from his and turned back to her desk.

"I've got to finish putting the rest of this information together for you guys." She handed one file to Reid.

"I'm going to ask Hotch if I can work from home till you get back." Reid told her rising from his chair.

"Why… Sherrie can handle Hope. I'm sure that everything is okay."

"I'm not. I'm going to keep her where I can see her till we find the man that sent these notes to you."

JJ had risen from her desk as and had opened her mouth to argue he knew. He put a hand over her mouth and said. "Don't argue. I'll take care of her." His face had adopted a very stern look, or what passed for stern with Reid. She wanted to laugh at the seriousness he was trying to convey, but didn't. It wasn't his fault that he couldn't maintain a hard look in his eyes.

"Okay… I'm done arguing with the profiler."

"Good… it's about time you realized that you can't win." He told her with a shy smile.

"Cute… I think there's a stunningly high probability that you're not going to get any when I get back if you don't watch it!"

"Nah… you can't resist me!" He reached out and yanked her to him for a kiss that completely shut down her brain.

"Well… it looks like we were wrong Morgan. There's nothing wrong with the love birds." Emily said from behind them.

JJ jumped away from Reid and flushed red while Morgan and Emily laughed. "You know… when the door's shut, that usually means you should knock. She snapped at them.

"Yeah… but then I wouldn't walk in on something fun." Emily snorted.

"That's really funny. Did you to need something or are you just here to harass us." JJ said putting one arm through Reid's with a possessive air.

"It's time to go out to the airstrip." Morgan told her with a grin.

"Right… I'll be right there."

"Come on Emily… lets give them a minute for a goodbye grope!" Morgan said dodging Reid's hand to his head.

"Will you tell me again, why we put up with them?" Reid asked his wife.

"Because they're our friends and our teammates, and murder is still illegal in this state." JJ said, pulling away from him again. She started to collect the files from her desk and put them into her briefcase.

"Right… that last reason is the best one of all."

"Listen… I've got to go." JJ stepped back up to him and kissed him. "I'll call you when we get to Pennsylvania."

"Okay… don't forget." He slapped her lightly on the backside and she squealed.

"You're in trouble now Dr. Reid!"

"Whatever… just get out of here." He picked up her bag and carried it to the elevator. She took it from him when they got there and smiled at him after getting on the car. He watched the doors close with a troubled heart. She would be okay. She knew how to take care of herself. Why did he feel like something bad was going to happen?

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The team arrived at the crime scene a few hours later. It was two miles off route 66 and about ten miles outside of Marienville, where Sheriff Stern's jurisdiction began. JJ had watched the landscape from the time they'd left the airport and started to drive to the forest. The surroundings were very familiar; she could be driving to her aunt's home right at that very minute.

She could hear the tires singing on the pavement while the SUV headed northwest into the Allegheny National Forest. American Elms, Paper Birch, Red Maple and other trees were covered with yellow green leaves of spring. There were flowers of all colors lining the road and she began to see pine trees appearing intermixed with other species. There was so much green it was overwhelming.

The rest of the team was talking about the case, but she wasn't paying attention. Her heart was beginning to race as it always did when she got to close to the woods. It wouldn't bother her so much but she couldn't remember exactly why she was so afraid. The story she'd once told Morgan and Spence was a lie, but some part of her wondered if there wasn't some truth in the story. Her aunt had always told her that the reason she was afraid was because of the accident that had killed her mother. Her aunt told her when she was eighteen that after the accident, JJ had been alone with her dead mother in the car for hours before someone came along and found them.

JJ didn't understand how her mother could have been killed and she had lived without a scratch. She tried to remember that night in the woods and all she could remember was the smell of rotting leaves. It was something she never told anyone, especially Reid. He'd had enough of that smell when Tobias Henkel had taken him away from them. How was she supposed to tell him that the smell of leaves in the rain, in the autumn, made her nearly as sick as it made him?

She looked up from the floor of the car and made her eyes look out the window again. They were fully surrounded by the woods now, and she began to concentrate on her daughter and Spencer to stay calm. Getting freaked out wouldn't help the team or the poor woman who'd lost her life. At least JJ was still alive.

The car pulled off the room dirt road and they clambered out. A tall man turned to see them as they were leaving the car. He went up to Hotch and introduced himself. "I'm Sheriff Adam Stern." He shook hands with Hotch and smiled grimly at the rest of the team, while Hotch made introductions.

"This is our unit liaison, Special Agent Jennifer Jareau."

She watched the older man blanch as he looked at her. His lined face went pale and his grey eyes narrowed.

"What did you say your name is?" He asked his voice dripping with accusation.

"I'm Jennifer Jareau, most people call me JJ." She repeated with as much dignity as she could muster under his disbelieving stare.

"Sir… is there a problem." Rossi asked impatiently.

"Yeah… she looks like the last victim from twenty five years ago. Who are you? What is your name?" He grabbed her arm.

"You want to take you hands off her." Morgan pulled the man away from JJ.

"I'm sorry… but you haven't seen Shelia Benjamin's picture, have you?"

"What has that got to do with anything?" Hotch asked, losing patience with this man.

"We've only seen the crime scene photos, and Sheila Benjamin wasn't in any condition to have a visual ID made." JJ told him, her face burning. He'd scared her, grabbing her that way.

"Look at this." The Sheriff pulled out his wallet and removed an old photograph from his wallet. He passed it to JJ and she looked at it. The air seemed to have left the day because she wasn't able to breath. She heard Rossi calling to her, but it was as though he was trying to talk through water. The smell of pine was suddenly overwhelming and then everything was black.

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"Okay… yeah… I'll be home in about forty minutes if the traffic co-operates. Yeah… no… I'm… going to work from home till JJ gets back. Yes… okay. I'll see you soon Sherrie. Okay… tell her daddy loves her. Okay… goodbye.

He snapped the phone shut and picked up the paperwork from the case. It went into his satchel with his phone and the notes JJ had received. He had to find away to concentrate on helping the team and finding JJ's stalker. It was strange though, he'd juggled cases before, but for some reason this was harder than he expected it to be.

The elevator took it's time getting to his floor and he was fidgeting in earnest by the time the doors opened. Six profilers from another team stepped off the elevator and they all had to greet Reid as they passed by. They had the look of a team just coming off a case. He recognized the dazed and exhausted looks on their faces. He wondered if they had been successful in catching the un-sub they'd been chasing. He didn't have time to ask any of them. That would have to wait until another day.

Even the elevator seemed to be conspiring against him. It moved slower than it ever had, although he was sure that was just the result of his desire to get home and assure himself that Hope was okay. The dream from the night before was weighing on his mind. Oh… he didn't think of himself as a psychic or prophetic in any way, but it made him wonder.

The elevator finally opened its doors on the parking garage and he let out a little sigh of relief. His car was at the far end of the parking lot. He trudged over, wondering how they'd managed to get the parking space farthest from the elevator. Not that he minded the walk, but his impatience to get home was bubbling over and his stomach was beginning to hurt. "Stop freaking out Dr. Reid. You're going to go home and find everything is just fine." He told himself in an irritable tone. "Stop talking to yourself." He added.

He finally reached the car, opened the door and threw his messenger bag on the front passenger seat. It was a perfectly sunny day outside and it grated on his nerves. Black clouds and thunder, and a rain-swept landscape would suit his mood better than the golden sunshine and the flowers he saw on the way back to Arlington.

His home with JJ was a modern brick style house. The color of the brick ranged from white through red brown and black. It was a two story home with a small front porch and three white columns in the front of the home. There was an attached garage and a pretty good sized front yard with grass and flower planters near the front door. There was a wooden fence separating the back yard from the front. It was painted white and JJ had laughed the first time she'd seen it.

"I guess I get the white picket fence after all." She'd said.

He'd made some comment about the fence along the lines that it wasn't a picket fence, but Hope had been crying and she'd ignored him.

Hope… that's why he was here. He parked the car outside the garage and went to the front door. His heart began to throw itself against his ribcage when he saw that the door stood halfway open.


	5. Adam Stern's story

_A/n hey guys, here's the next chapter. I'm so happy with all the response to this story. Thanks for all your reviews! _

_Disclaimer: Nothing recognizable is mine. Only the original characters belong to me._

_**Adam Stern's story **_

"Look at this." The Sheriff pulled out his wallet and removed an old photograph from his wallet. He passed it to JJ and she looked at it. The air seemed to have left the day because she wasn't able to breath. She heard Rossi calling to her, but it was as though he was trying to talk through water. The smell of pine was suddenly overwhelming and then everything was black.

_Branches were slapping her face as she ran. It was so scary here with all the tall trees. Her mommy had told her that she would like the woods. She said that the woods were fun to walk in and to explore. She was really excited and a little scared when they first came to the woods, but then her mommy took her on a walk and she saw all the pretty flowers that were red, yellow, pink and purple. There were birds that made sounds she'd never heard before, but they were the sweetest sounds in the world. _

_The trees were so tall and there were hundreds of green leaves clinging to the branches. The sun looked broken in pieces when she looked up at the sky through the elms and the pines. He mother held tightly to her hand, and wouldn't let her slip away after the cute little animals that ran from her and up the trees. _

"_Jenny… stay near mommy!" _

_The voice of the mother was so close and yet so far away at the same time. It was like a radio fading in and out of her hearing. She was getting scared and she held tighter to the hand that seemed to be trying to slip away…_

_A shadow suddenly fell over both of them as if from nowhere. He mothers hand was pulled away from hers, "Run Jenny!"_

_The scream echoed into the sunlight and mixed with the cries of the birds that leaped off the branches and flew away. _

"JJ… wake up."

"Can you hear me JJ?"

"JJ… Come on wake up…"

All the voices were a clamor in her brain, mingling with the bird calls and the scream in her head. Her eyes blinked open and she saw the concerned faces of the team and Sherriff Stern. How could he have a picture of her mother in his wallet? How could her mother be the same Shelia Benjamin that was in the picture Stern had shown her? It couldn't be true; her mother had been killed in a car accident. Her Aunt Sarah had told her so. And yet… she had vague feelings that her aunt's story wasn't true. Why would her aunt lie to her?

"JJ… are you alright," Hotch asked his dark eyes filled with concern? She let him pull her to a sitting position. She noticed the trees around her looked the same as they had in her dream, or vision, or memory of whatever she'd seen in her head.

"I'm confused…" She admitted. "That picture?" Sherriff Stern looked very upset to see her sitting on the ground among the colorful flowers. "I'm sorry Agent Jareau… Did you know her?"

She saw that he was the only one to ask the question all the others had in their eyes. God… how could this be true? The case file the Sherriff had sent her had said that Shelia Benjamin had been found five days after her death. Her body had been decaying deep in the woods, and had been found by a hermit that lived in a cabin several miles from where he found her corpse. He'd been questioned and cleared.

The others had been found out in the open, the killer wanting them to be found. She'd been with the team long enough to speculate. A body hidden when the killer had always displayed them proudly could mean that she'd know her killer. Or it could be that Sheila Benjamin - she refused to call her mother - was a witness to something she shouldn't have seen.

"JJ…" Morgan grasped her shoulder.

"I'm okay… I just don't understand. That woman…" She can't be my mother?"

"JJ…" Hotch began.

"No… I won't believe it!" She noticed an ant crawling across Morgan's shoe. She got to her feet ignoring Sherriff Stern's out stretched hand. She brushed off her dark grey slacks and thanked God she put them on instead of skirt that morning.

"My aunt told me my mother died in a car accident when I was five. I don't remember anything about it." She told them all defensively as though they might think she was lying. She rounded on the Sherriff and he jumped back again.

"Sherriff Stern what do you know about all of this?"

"Let's get to the crime scene. We can talk as we walk." Hotch insisted.

They turned to follow the path and Sherriff Stern began to tell them the story as he knew it. "I met you mother when you were four years old."

He ignored her disbelieving stare. "She was running away from an abusive husband. She told me she was from Ohio. She was working as waitress at Jerry's Place. It's the oldest diner in town and Jerry's been running it forever. You were the cutest little girl. You went to work with her everyday and stayed in the kitchen with Jerry and his wife Helga. They loved you so much. I think you reminded them of the daughter they lost.

Sheila's car had taken a semi-permanent vacation, and she was trying to get the money together to get it fixed and get back on the road again. She told me she didn't have any family to help her and I believed her. She didn't want to talk about it. She was about the age you are right now and I was a twenty two year old kid, just out of the academy."

JJ was walking next to him and he held the greening tree branches away from her face. She saw a little grey squirrel run from branch to branch, and she remembered holding her mothers hand and seeing all of this from the perspective of several feet closer to the ground. The awe she felt as a child seeing the squirrel running through the trees.

_(No baby… you can't take it home with you) _

"She was so beautiful and vulnerable. My partner told me the first time she served us that she was out of my league and he was right. I tried to ask her out a couple of times, but she blew me off. She was nice about it, but she said that no man was going to hurt her again like that. She worked at the café for about six months. She arrived about the same time as the killer began his career and I was always afraid for her working in that diner nights. Jerry and his wife made sure she got home safe to the motel she lived in.

Then one day she didn't come into work. She'd never missed a day or called in sick. Helga called us and we assumed at first that she moved on, but then you were found and we knew something was wrong."

They were climbing a bit on the path, the rest of the team was following two by two and the trees were getting thicker around them. The path was clearly marked, but JJ could see how someone could get lost. The pine trees were old and huge, and their scent was heavy in the air. At least she couldn't smell rotting leaves. God… this was so crazy.

"We looked for her for five days, but it was a hiker that found her body. Her hands were cut off -" He was explaining and then he saw JJ's face.

"Oh… I'm sorry Agent Jareau, I -"

"Don't worry about me!" JJ snapped at him.

His eyes narrowed at her and then he just shrugged his shoulders. If that was the way she wanted it that was fine with him.

"As I was saying," He went on in a gravelly voice, "Her hands were gone and the elements had done a job on her, and so had the animals, but we were able to tell that she was stabbed to death like the others. We don't know if she was raped, there were no fluids found, and as I said due to the elements and the animals…" He trailed off.

He stopped and she saw the dark patch of blood on the trail. "This is where we found our latest victim."

"Are there any dwellings or caves that we'd need to look at around here, is there anyplace he's keeping them before killing them?" Rossi asked, looking around at the trees.

"No… not within reach of this path. I have no idea how he's getting in here to dump the bodies without anyone noticing." The frustration was palpable from him, and JJ felt a moment's pity for the man that had chased this killer for so long.

"Morgan… I need you and Emily to talk to Sandra Sorenson's family." Hotch ordered.

"I can have one of my deputies take you out there." Sherriff Stern asked.

They looked walked the scene, but there was nothing to be found anywhere close to where the body was dumped.

"There's never been anything found to tie this guy to them forensically. No semen, no hairs, not fibers, nothing at all." Stern told them.

"Okay… let's get back to your office." Hotch told the Sherriff. We need to get started on victimology and the profile." He looked at Rossi and the other man nodded.

The headed back to the car as the afternoon sunshine beat down on their heads. The light was almost white on their heads and shoulders, and it was so beautiful that JJ's heart caught in her throat. She was trying really hard not to give into the desire to run far away from this place. If Reid could overcome the worst of his PTSD and a drug addiction, then she could do the same.

The walk back to the car was much longer then she thought it would be, as she didn't have the Sherriff talking to her to distract her from the wind sighing in the trees, and the sounds of the leaves rustling as the animals ran through them or over the boughs of the trees. Birds were chirping and chills ran up her back. She shivered and then Emily was walking next to her. She didn't touch her friend or say anything; it was just nice to have a friendly person next to her instead of the Sherriff. They got back to the vehicles and left the scene. JJ hoped this one would be over fast; she couldn't take anymore time in the woods.

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He approached the door as though it was booby trapped with a bomb and for all he knew, maybe it was. He tried to slow the hammering of his heart, but it wouldn't obey his will. He reached out a hand and long tented fingers pushed it open. It went on silent hinges, but he could imagine that it was the creaky door of an old haunted house.

_Stop thinking like that, your daughter is in there!_

One hand pulled his gun out of his holster and the other pushed the door completely open. The entry way was full of late afternoon sunshine. He stepped quickly across the stone floor and onto the cream colored carpet of the living room. The big screen TV was dark and the chocolate leather couch was un-occupied as far as he could tell.

He looked left toward the kitchen and was about to call out to Sherrie, when he sat the feet that were attached to the jean clad legs of his babysitter. He edged around the corner and the young dark haired woman lay there with a bullet in her head. He swallowed hard and backed away slowly to the door. He went outside and pulled his phone from his belt.

His hands were shaking so badly, he could hardly dial 911. "This is Special Agent Spencer Reid; I've got a gunshot victim in my home, requesting back up at 809 Fieldcrest Lane Arlington."

The operator acknowledged his request and he went back into the house. He should stay outside and wait for back up, but Hope as in there. He had to make sure she was okay. To the right of the living room were two small bedrooms and right next to the living room, separated by a wall was the master bedroom and bath.

He went to his daughter's room first and slowly opened the door with one hand. Hope was asleep in her crib, and a man stood next to the bed, much to close for Reid to hope to get to his little girl. There was a gun in the man's hand and he had it pointed at the little girl.

"You weren't supposed to be home now. Why are you here?" The man demanded, looking very upset.

"Let's just calm down, why don't we go into the living room and we can talk." Reid said, his gun hand was steady on the man, but his other hand was shaking. He hoped the man didn't see it.

"No… why don't you put the gun down or I'll kill this beautiful little girl. She's as lovely as her mother isn't she." He smiled at Reid, and it was a terrible smile. Where was his back up?


	6. Revelations

_A/n hey everybody. I just want to say thanks to all who've left reviews or added this to their alerts or favorites. _

_Disclaimer: I keep checking but their still not mine._

_**Revelations**_

"Let's just calm down…why don't we go into the living room and we can talk." Reid said, his gun hand was steady, but his other hand was shaking.

"No… why don't you put the gun down or I'll kill this beautiful little girl. She's as lovely as her mother isn't she." He smiled at Reid, and it was a terrible smile. Where was his back up?

"Put down your gun… right… now!" the man moved his gun closer to the golden curls of Hope's sleeping head. Reid's heart was already in his throat, so disagreeing was impossible. He tried to swallow past the lump and think quickly.

"That's not going to happen." Reid croaked out desperately. He hoped the man couldn't see how his hands were shaking. A drop of sweat began to roll down the back of his neck. Insanely he wanted to laugh because it tickled him.

"Oh… you are a scary one." The man said sarcastically. His dark eyes flashed manically. "I've got suits at home with more to them than you, skinny little man." He giggled.

"W-why don't we go talk in the living r-room," Reid said again. "We don't need t be here." He tried to speak reasonably. A stutter was working its way into his speech.

The man laughed again. "Oh… I'm quite comfortable here." He took a step closer to Hope's crib. Reid jerked his gun back up to bear on the man.

_Where was his backup?_

"Back off Dr Reid… I will use this." He waved the gun at Reid's sleeping daughter and Reid froze in mid step. He had to get inside this guy's head or Hope would pay the price.

"Now… put you gun down and get out of my way. I have a job to do."

Reid didn't move. "You'll never get out of the city." Reid said, hoping he sounded more confident than he felt. More drops of sweat ran down his back. The beat of his heart was making him feel faint and the room seemed to be getting smaller around him.

The man cocked his pistol. "Put the gun down. I won't tell you again. You're FBI, I'm sure you know exactly what this will do to the pretty little head at this range." He laughed again.

"No… I don't think so!" Reid said, the trembling in his hands had stopped, but his heart was still making him dizzy.

"I'm surprised… I was told you were a frightened little rabbit. I guess my information was incorrect. What a pity!" The man clucked his tongue and looked severely disappointed by this revelation on Spencer's character.

"You won't hurt her. You were ordered to bring Hope back alive, weren't you?" Reid told him, trying to keep one eye on his daughter and one eye on the man in front of him.

"What do you know about it? The man demanded pushing his black hair out of his eyes with his free hand.

Reid's hand was beginning to ache with the strain of holding the gun on the man. He nearly turned in surprise when he heard the creak of a floorboard outside the partially open door. The man showed no sign of hearing the same sound. Reid tried to distract the man, if back up was here; he had to play this carefully.

"You're here to take my daughter to your employer. Why don't you take me with you instead, I'm a Federal Agent and I can get your employer anything he wants." Reid put his gun down on the changing table.

"No… I think I'll take what I came for. Step away from the gun and put your hands up." He ordered Reid impatiently. Reid put his hands up and moved away from the gun and toward the man.

"Pick up your daughter… Dr. Reid." He gestured to Hope with his gun.

Reid went to the crib and looked down at his little girl. She slept with her face all screwed up like JJ did sometimes. His heart thudded painfully in his chest just to see her looking so much like his beloved JJ.

He reached down and picked her up as gently as he could. Her weight in his arms was comforting, and terrifying at the same time. Her head lolled back but she stayed asleep with her arms clasped around her Elmo doll. He kissed her forehead.

"Get going," The man said and Reid felt the business end of the gun dig into his side.

The man shoved him forward with the gun and Reid stumbled out of the door. Then he shifted and stepped sideways, diving for the bathroom door before the man could move or speak. There was a shout, something thudded against the wall dividing the nursery and the bathroom. There were more shouting and thuds as the officers of the DC police took the man down without a shot being fired.

Reid looked down at Hope and her eyelids fluttered open. An officer had entered the room to clear it at the same time and she saw him burst in with a gun in his hand. He stopped and instantly lowered the gun at the sight of Reid and Hope.

"Dada," Her large blue eyes filled up with tears and her lower lip began to quiver, as she hugged tightly to her doll.

"Shh… baby-girl… It's okay." He glared at the cop while attempting to soothe her as best he could. "Don't cry sweetheart; see the scary man is leaving." The cop had the good sense to leave the room when he saw the look Reid had on his face.

Reid dropped down on the edge of the bath tub. "Daddy stay," Hope asked, tears rolling down her sleep flushed face?

"Yes princess… daddy will stay right here." he gave one blond curl and gentle tug and smiled down at her.

He rocked a little with her in his arms and she babbled to him, most of what she said didn't make a whole lot of sense, but he figured if he were a three year old and confronted by a gun, he might not make sense either. It took a while but she finally calmed down.

There was a knock on the door and another officer came in. "Agent Reid," he asked?

"Yes… I'm Dr. Reid."

"Detective Stewart from Robbery Homicide is here. He'd like to ask you a few questions."

Reid followed the officer out of the bathroom. "Would you ask him to join me in the nursery? I don't want my daughter seeing her babysitter like that."

"Of course," They went into the nursery and the officer went to get the detective. Reid attempted to put Hope back in her crib. She dropped her Elmo doll and clamped her arms around his neck.

"No… stay with daddy," She begged. He sat in the glider rocker with Hope cuddled in his lap. The officer came back with the detective.

"I'm Detective Stewart," he said. He was about five ten with sandy blond hair. He was as thin as Reid and he wore a suit that reminded Reid of Hotch. He had that same air about him as Hotch and Reid approved. This man would do all he could to find out what had just happened here.

"I'm Supervisory Special Agent Dr. Spencer Reid of the BAU." Reid introduced himself while Hope played with his tie.

"What can you tell me about this?" The man asked getting out his notebook.

Reid explained everything that had happened including the notes JJ had got in the mail. The Detective raised an eyebrow. "I'd like to see those communications, Dr. Reid."

"Of course, I'll get you copies of everything you need. I need the body to go to Quantico. She needs to be posted by the federal lab."

"I'll go see to it. You'll copy me on everything?" He asked but it was really a command.

"Yes… now I need to get out of here and back to Quantico. My daughter's life has been threatened and I need to get her under protection. I also need to contact my wife." JJ was going to freak out, but there was nothing he could do about it.

"Fine… I'll be in touch Dr. Reid." The detective got to his feet and again reminded Reid of Hotch by smiling at Hope and reaching out to caress her hair with the tenderness of a father. Reid noticed the ring on his hand for the first time. 

"How many kids do you have?" Reid asked surprising himself at this personal inquiry.

"Two… a boy and a girl… they're both teenagers now, but I still remember when my little girl was small. Protect her with your life Dr. Reid."

"I will…" Reid answered not at all offended by the man's order. They smiled at each other and the detective left after exchanging business cards with the young doctor.

Reid was ready to leave forty minutes later. He got Hope into her car seat with Elmo. She began to babble at her doll and he wanted to laugh. Kids were so resilient; he hoped this experience didn't scar her for life. He hoped she was young enough to forget. He went around to the front and the driver's seat. His mind was whirling. The man he'd found in his house was on his way to Quantico for interrogation and Strauss was assigning another team to deal with him. Reid wanted to talk to him, but Strauss forbade it. Well… she couldn't stop him from observing and that's exactly what he intended to do.

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The team arrived back at the Sheriff's office in Marienville. They were given the only interrogation room to gather together and discuss the profile.

"It concerns me that this un-sub has been silent for so long." Emily said.

"If he's been in jail that would explain it," Morgan remarked as they sat down around the metal table in the middle of the room.

"No… I don't think that's the case. He was smart enough to employ forensic countermeasures. He was smart enough not to get caught twenty five years ago." Rossi remarked.

"Let's look at the victimology. All of the victims from twenty five years ago fit the same physical parameters. None of the women knew each other. All of them were drifters that came into town and never left. Only one, Sally Dempsey, was reported missing. The rest didn't have families to worry about them. All of them were educated women that for some reason or another went off the grid, and became wanderers." Hotch was saying as he flipped through the photographs.

"They only difference was Shelia Benjamin," Emily said looking quickly at JJ. Her friend was in a chair in a corner talking quietly on the phone. She was doing her job, but her body language was screaming her discomfort and bewilderment. Emily wished Reid were there. He was the only one that could calm her. JJ hadn't heard her comment or if she did she wasn't reacting to the sound of her mother's name.

She'd told them that her aunt had told her that her mother's name was Stacey. JJ had believed that her father had been killed by a mugger on business in New York. The possibility that he was alive now was freaking her out and Emily didn't blame her.

"He's got some kind of law enforcement training." Morgan said.

"Or he watches TV. With all the true crime shows and crime scene investigator shows, it's easy to employ forensic countermeasures outside of law enforcement." Rossi countered.

"Yes… but this guy did everything right. He didn't have any missteps. He reminds me of Frank Breitkopf." Morgan said angrily.

"Alright… let's get the cops here together and give them our profile." Hotch said.

The team left the room and JJ followed dejectedly. She had to show Hotch that she could handle being on this case, or he'd send her home and make Spence come out in her place. She didn't want to disrupt the team like that.

They gathered the officers together and Morgan began to tell them what they were looking for. "We're looking for a man in his late forties to early fifties. He's physically strong and he blends in around this town. He's one of you."

The officers began to protest, but Rossi cut them off sharply. "He is a member of this community. He may be in law enforcement or he's now retired."

"Are you trying to say that he's one of us? If you haven't noticed we're a pretty small bunch here and I think that we would know if one of us had gone round the bend and killed someone. He'd have to be someone that's been here for awhile and the only one that fits that profile is the Sheriff here." The young blond officer began to laugh and so did the others.

"We're not accusing anyone. We're saying that this guy knows enough to avoid leaving a trace of him at the scene or on the bodies. He knows the area well enough to kill these women and leave them exactly where he wants them to be found." Rossi said.

"If that's true, where has he been all this time? I may just be a small town cop, but I know enough to know these guys don't just stop killing unless you stop them." Another dark haired cop asked with a sneer in his voice.

"We don't know, but if he wasn't in jail then it's possible that Sheila Benjamin scared him into hiding. He could've kept killing and just hid the bodies instead of displaying them. We need to look into any unexplained disappearances in this area." Emily told him.

"He'll inject himself into the investigation, just as he did twenty-five years ago." Morgan said to the men.

The deputies separated grumbling amongst themselves. "Don't worry about them," Sheriff Stern told the profilers. "They have good hearts and intentions."

"It's fine; we've had worse reactions to profiles." Hotch said with a bit of a smile.

"If we got a good reaction everywhere we went, we wouldn't know how to act." Emily said.

Sheriff Stern smiled at her, his light blues eyes crinkling up with his smile. JJ's phone rang and she smiled at the name on the caller ID. She stepped back into the interrogation room to take the call. When she came back out, her face was as white as a sheet.

"Hey… what's wrong?" Emily said, grabbing her arm and steering her to a chair.

"It's Hope! That was Spence… someone tried to kidnap her. Sherrie was killed. If Spence hadn't walked in on it…" She began to cry so hard that Emily pulled her into her arms and held on tight.

"Let's get her back to the jet!" Rossi said.

"I'll take her; you need to focus on the case." Sheriff Stern offered.

"Thanks…" Hotch shook his hand and the others went to speak quietly with JJ. Emily retrieved JJ's bag from the borrowed SUV and the Sheriff took her out to his own car.

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JJ watched the trees going in the opposite direction. After the first shock of Spence's phone call had worn off, she just felt numb. It was her fault. She knew it had to be connected to the notes she got. She should have said something sooner. How could she forget?

"It must be hard being married to a profiler." Sheriff Stern's voice moved through the fog in her brain.

"Sometimes, but Spence is pretty good at turning it off outside of work."

"That's good. My wife always says you don't have to know everything about your spouse. She says if you do it creates more harm than good."

"Yeah… she's a smart woman." JJ told him.

"Yep… she's great. She never complained that we couldn't have kids. She always wanted a daughter like you. Your little girl is as beautiful as her mother."

"What…" JJ asked, frowning at the last sentence. The Sheriff had never seen Hope.

"I said I'll bet she's as beautiful as her mother." He said smiling again at her.

"No… that's not what you said." She watched the Sheriff slow down and turn off the road onto a dirt road in really bad condition. "What are you doing… where are we going?" He eyes darted over to the man next to her and her heart began to thud sickly in his chest.

"You're as beautiful as your mother. I tried to take care of her but she wouldn't let me. She wanted to go back to that scum of a husband. I wanted to be your father. You ran away the day I came for her. I couldn't chase you and grab her, so I had to kill her. Now I have you and somehow, I'll get your girl too. You don't need Spencer Reid; he'll hurt you sooner or later. I can take care of you just as I tried to help your mother."

"You killed my mother…you bastard." Her voice filled the car like the clamor of church bells. She tried to open the door and jump out but the electronic locks were engaged and the passenger side controls didn't work when she tried them. The car slowed and as she turned back to look at the man next to her, he slammed his gun along the side of her head.


	7. A little knowledge, a little too late

_A/n hello everybody. Once again I have to thank all you wonderful reviewers and anyone that has added this to their alerts. Also a big thanks to my beta REIDFANATIC, for all of her help._

_Disclaimer: Only that which is not recognizable belongs to me._

_**A little knowledge, a little too late.**_

Reid arrived at Quantico with Hope in her stroller. She had fallen back to sleep with the motion of the car. She still held tightly to her Elmo doll, but her face was more peaceful. Reid wasn't feeling peaceful. He envied his little girl. She could just go to sleep as though nothing had happened. He hoped that his daughter never had to deal with anything like this every again. She was the reason he continued to do this job even when its horrors threatened to consume him and her mother. They had to make the world a better place for her to grow up in and raise her own family.

He made his way to Garcia's office. Her door was partially open and he knocked on it. "Come in," She said in a very distracted voice.

"Hey Garcia," He said, going into her inner sanctum.

She turned and almost squealed at the sight of Hope. Reid put a finger to his lips and smiled, so instead she said. "What brings my favorite girl to the BAU?" He parked the stroller next to her desk.

Reid told her what happened and Garcia hugged him hard when he finished. "Oh my sweet boy, I can't believe someone would hurt my little sunshine." She was frowning down at the sleeping tthree year old.

"I need your help. Hope is staying here with me. I won't let anything else happen to her."

"Ok sugar. I was going to call you anyway. I came up negative on the search you wanted." She looked very annoyed at her failure and Reid wanted to laugh.

"I thought you might, the man that tried to take Hope is Charles Skylar. What can you find out about him?"

"Just give me a minute and I'll tell you everything you need to know." Garcia turned back to her babies, and made them hum. He watched her with that sense of awe that always overcame him when she worked the keyboard like a concert pianist.

"Ok sweet cheeks… here's your info." She said with that wonderful confidence he wished he could have in his voice. "Charles Skylar is a resident of the DC. He just got out of the slammer. He was a former guest of the State of New York on Rikers Island. He just finished a ten year stint for assault and battery. Pick a crime, any crime, and he's done it, except for murder, or if he has he hasn't been caught."

Reid was thinking furiously. The man had someone else pulling his strings, he was sure of that, but who. Did this have something to do with the murder in Pennsylvania? His phone beeped and he took the call. It was SSA Malone letting him know they had Skylar in interrogation. He thanked the agent and told him he would be right there.

"Thanks Garcia, I've got to go observe Skylar. I hate to ask, but can you watch Hope. I don't think observation is a great place for her, besides JJ would kill me!" He asked a little shamefaced.

"You don't have to ask Sugar. You know I love my little sunshine." Garcia looked down at Hope with a fond smile.

"I know… I just don't want to put you out." He said, fiddling with the edge of the diaper bag in the back of the stroller.

"Reid… you're not putting me out. I love Hope. Don't stress about it. Now get out of here and leave us alone. We need some serious girl time together." She shooed him out of her office and went back to the stroller.

"Let's show daddy we don't need him." He heard her say quietly to his daughter and he chuckled. She always knew how to make him smile. Her upbeat attitude made him try not to worry about the two women in his life.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

JJ's head was whirling when the blackness retreated and light began to penetrate under her eyelids. She let them drift open. Sunlight was warm and golden on her left side.

"Spence," she choked out uncertainly.

There was only silence to answer her call. Turning her head was a big mistake when she tried to move. The left side ached and burned. She lifted a shaking hand to her face and felt along the side of her head. It was tacky with something from the hair line to the edge of her left eye.

_Oh… you know what it is Jennifer!_

She closed her eyes against the brightness of the sun and let her hand drift down to her side. Yes… She didn't have to see it to know that it was blood. She could smell the coppery stench; she didn't have to see the red brightness on her fingertips. The light was warm on her face. Her eyelids began to open again and the dizziness returned. The bright light burned into her sensitive eyes when she tried to look left again.

"Spence…" She croaked once more, but he wasn't there.

Right… She wasn't in her own bed. In fact, the cloth beneath her body was rough and smelled musty. It didn't appear that her arms were restrained. How the hell had this happened? How had she not seen what he was? A blinding surge of rage shot through her whole body. It pushed away the fear that was trying to worm its way into her stomach.

At least Hope was safe with Spence. The desperate hammering of her heart didn't help the dizzy feeling in her aching head. Her head turned to the right and met the wall. It looked like an old-fashioned log cabin. Her eyes were a bit blurred, so she wasn't sure. The must smell was stronger and her headache was getting worse.

Alright Jareau… let's think about this. You've been in this situation before. Think! The ceiling overhead didn't look like a typical basement ceiling. It just looked like a ceiling. Why were un-subs so found of dark, dank basements?

_Stop thinking about things that don't matter and figure a way out of here!_

Stretching her body and moving her legs proved that her captor wasn't worried about her escaping. She shivered and tried to sit up. He head was still buzzing; but she raised herself up into a sitting position and swung her legs over the side of whatever she was lying on.

Her feet touched the floor, and she hissed and flinched back at the cold under her toes. Wait a minute…why could she feel ice cold stone under her feet? Okay… don't panic. She looked down and saw that her feet were bare. Well… this can't be good.

Her head still hurt like a son of a bitch, but for just a small moment, she wondered if it were all a very vivid dream. She pushed back to the wall and crossed her arms in front of her chest. It was so cold in here.

She closed her eyes once more and decided that in a minute she'd wake up next to Spence. She'd turn over and see him sleeping all curled up like the pill bugs she remembered from her aunt's garden as a child. His hair would be all mussed and sticking straight up in places. He looked so much like a little boy when he slept, that it made her heart hurt. She'd wake him up with a kiss and he would smile at her. Why had she waited so long to leave her doubts behind and just go for it? Yes… any minute she'd wake up and he'd be there with his love for her and Hope shining brightly in his eyes, those wonderful chocolate brown orbs that looked at her like no one else. That love would warm her and keep out the demons that threatened her peace every day.

_Please let me wake up and leave this nightmare behind!_

She opened her eyes then shut them again tightly. She opened them carefully, but the scene hadn't changedThe cabin still stood around her. It wasn't a dream. She had to get used to it and find a way out.

"Hello… is someone there?" she hated the tentative tone of her voice. "Hey… if you're out there, give me my shoes… right now! She demanded in the most commanding tone she could muster. "Let me go you fucking bastard." She screamed at the seemingly empty cabin. There was no answer.

She looked down and saw that the rest of her clothes seemed to be intact. If she could find her shoes or her socks, she could have a look outside.

Her shoes weren't in the small room she was in. There was only a bed, a dresser and a door. The door led to a small living room and kitchen to the right and a bathroom to the left. It kind of looked like how she remembered Gideon's cabin. What made her heart turn to ice was that her shoes were gone. She went to the door and opened it with no problem. Her heart sank within her chest and fear was kicking up again. She was completely surrounded by woods.

Even if she could overcome her desperate fear, she didn't know which way to run. There was no way her feet would stand up to the terrain. There had to be a way. She had to get back to Hope someway. She shut the door and went back to her room. There had to be another way.

She heard the outside door open and her heart began to race. She wanted to run, but she had to stay calm. She watched as Sheriff Stern walked into the room.

"How are you my beautiful Jennifer? I hope you're comfortable. You and I will be together for a long time." He smiled at her.

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Reid watched the agents interrogate Skylar. Actually… it was turning out to be an easy interview. When the agents told him how long he could expect to spend in the Federal Pen for attempted kidnapping and assault of a federal agent, he rolled over on his employer.

"Hey look… I didn't plan this. I was contacted on the internet. All I was supposed to do was take the kid. I was going to let her go after twenty four hours. He said he would pay me fifty thousand dollars just to take the kid. I wasn't going to hurt her." He said looking frantically between the two agents in the room with him.

"So… tell us who he is and we'll talk about a deal for you." Agent Monroe told him.

"Ok… alright… his name is Adam Stern. He's the Sheriff of Marienville. Can you believe that? What did this agent Reid do to piss off a cop in Pennsylvania?"

Reid left the observation room at a run. He had to warn the team. The first call he made was to JJ's cell but there was no answer. It went straight to voicemail. He phone never went straight to voicemail. Something was terribly wrong.

"Hey baby… I need you to call me back as soon as you get this message, it's urgent."

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Garcia was trying to work and ignore the cute little person next to her. It was a good thing the girl was asleep, or she'd be playing with the toddler instead of working. She sighed, tried to forget that she was getting older, and Morgan was still balking at the idea of a baby for them.

Her phone beeped and it was the man of her dreams. She forgot to be mad and greeted him in the usual fashion, with a touch more warmth than years before as he was her husband and not just a co-worker.

"Hey stud, when are you coming home, so I can ravish that fabulous body of your's." She said hungrily, imagining all the things she wanted to do to him when he walked in the door.

"_Hey mama…" _His voice drifted through the handset and into her ears making her belly tingle for a minute before her brain took control of her hormones. He sounded horrible, worse than when she'd turned him down the first time he asked her out.

"Derek… what's wrong. What's happened?"

"_Penelope, we've got a serious problem. I've got something to tell Reid. I know it's not right or fair but I gotta ask you to talk to him. It'll be easier for him to hear it from you." _

"Baby you're scaring me. What's going on?"

"It's JJ… we just got word from the pilot. She never showed up for the flight back to Quantico."

Garcia swallowed hard, "Well… that doesn't mean anything. Maybe she had car trouble or something…"

"No… the Sheriff took her in his car and he isn't responding to the radio call the deputy sent out. We've called JJ's cell at least ten times and she doesn't answer. We were so stupid baby girl. We think he might be the un-sub and now he has JJ."

"I don't know -"

"Hey Garcia," Reid's excited voice came from behind her. She whipped around and saw the fear in his eyes. "I know who the un-sub is. His name is…"

"Sheriff Stern," Garcia finished for him.

"We need to talk sweet thing." She told him.


	8. The cabin in the woods

_A/n hey all, here's the next chapter. I'm still very gratified to read all the kind reviews you've sent. I love hearing what you all have to say. Thanks again!_

_Disclaimer: I own only what's not recognizable._

_**The Cabin in the woods **_

"Hey Garcia," Reid's excited voice came from behind her. She whipped around and saw the fear in his eyes. "I know who the un-sub is. His name is…"

"Sheriff Stern," Garcia finished for him. "We need to talk sweet thing." She told him.

"Garcia… what happened… you're as white as a sheet." Reid asked.

She turned back to her screen and he could hear her murmuring into her head set. Reid tried not to listen, but from her tone, she was upset and trying to calm her husband. He still couldn't believe those two were married. He still wasn't clear on how that had happened, but then he still didn't understand how JJ had come to love him. It was a great mystery that he…

"Hey gorgeous, you with us," Garcia's voice cut through his musings like a razor?

"Ah - yeah… did you tell Morgan about the Sheriff?"

"Yeah…" Reid saw how she looked at him and his mouth went dry. Something was very wrong.

_Don't freak out Spencer! Any minute she'll tell you that something went wrong, but it won't have anything to do with JJ._

He avoided her eyes and looked at Hope. His girl was waking up. He picked her up and cuddled her in his arms. She smelled fresh and clean, like the scent of pleasant dreams and promises to be kept. All he had to do is smell that scent and everything would be okay.

"Hey Reid… are you awake?" Garcia asked again. He looked up at her tone and saw that she was crying.

"Garcia… you're scaring me. What's happened?" Hope was completely awake and she began to squirm in his arms and reach out to Garcia.

"Me want 'arcia" She said.

Garcia took her without a word and Hope looked back and forth between them. "Sweet cheeks… JJ's gone. She never made the flight back. Derek made me tell you." She said bluntly and very fast, as though swiftness would soften the blow.

Reid simply watched Hope tug on Garcia's curls and giggle. There had to be a mistake. It was a joke cooked up between Morgan and Garcia. He'd thought she was his best friend, but friends don't joke like this.

"I don't find that funny Garcia," His tone ice cold.

"I'm not joking sweet cheeks. I wish to God I was. Sheriff Stern offered to take her to the jet. She went with him. There was no reason for her not to go." Garcia flinched back and Hope began to cry.

"Want mama…" She wailed.

Reid took the girl back into his arms and kissed her cheek. He tried to rock her, but it had little effect on her tears.

"I know princess, so do I." He told her trying to soothe her, but she only cried harder.

"I'm sorry honey but… " Garcia trailed off at the look on Reid's face.

"Where mama, me want mama," Hope screamed.

Reid stood back up and put Hope in her stroller ignoring Garcia's attempts to talk to him. He left the office and headed down the hallway to his wife's office.

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"Why are you doing this," JJ asked, as she mentally kicked herself for being so cliché. Every victim asked their captor that same question, didn't they?

"I told you. We're going to be together always. Here… I'm giving you your shoes back." He brought one hand from around his back and dropped them in front of her.

_It has to be a trick. _

"I assure you I'm serious. Put them on now. We have to leave this place." He commanded, training his service pistol on her.

"No one will hear a shot way out here," He informed her when she didn't move.

JJ stood her ground looking carefully at his face, and ignoring the gun even though the sight of it had sent her heart racing.

"Please put the shoes on?" He said politely. "Jenny I only want to take care of you. Why are you making this so hard, little girl?

"You killed my mother and you dare to ask me that," She said heavy sarcasm in her voice.

The Sherriff went red with anger. "Just because I didn't get my hands on that beautiful little girl doesn't mean I won't send someone else. In fact, it might be prudent to get Dr. Reid after all." He smiled that same insane smile that made her blood run cold.

"You touch either one of them and I swear I'll find away to kill you myself." She promised her eyes blazing.

"Oh shut up with the empty threats and put your shoes on now." He raised the gun again and cocked it.

She would wait and find away to get to him. She bent down and grabbed the shoes and socks. He leaned against the wall and smiled as JJ sat down to put on the shoes. When she finished, she looked up at him with a flushed and tear stained face.

"Now…" He gestured toward the outside door with his gun. "We're going to go for a walk."

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Hotch approached the wall Rossi was staring at. They'd tacked up every piece of information and evidence they had on the white board in front of them. Hotch was doing double duty, dealing with the media and trying to find JJ.

The entire Sheriff's department and the state police had gone to Stern's home. His wife, bewildered and angry insisted that she didn't know where her husband was. Morgan had wanted to go, but Hotch had held him back. He knew Morgan wanted to beat JJ's captor to a bloody pulp and Hotch didn't blame him, but one of them had to maintain their control.

He looked at the pictures of all the victims and the information Garcia had managed to dig up on the Sheriff. There was nothing in his past to suggest that he had anything to do with the old murders and the events of the past two days. How had it gone on for so long without anyone noticing?

"Why didn't we see it Dave," He asked the older agent?

"Because we didn't want to see it," Rossi said simply. "JJ is a member of our team and we're a family whether we like it or not. Remember what happened four years ago." He held up a hand before Hotch could speak. "I've read the case file Aaron. JJ should've reported the rape. Reid should've told you if she wasn't willing or able to talk to the police. Michael Van Cott shouldn't have got that close to her in the first place."

"Dave I know you're right, but I can see it from her side. She's just been raped, made completely vulnerable, physically and emotionally. Yeah… so she's Jennifer Jareau, kick ass FBI agent. She's trained not to be intimidated, but she's also a woman. She's in love with a fellow agent that just survived a horrific experience that literally cost him his life, if only for a few minutes. He let drugs rule him and she was attacked by wild dogs. It was enough for anyone to succumb to psychological terrorism. Any other time she never would have believed Michael Van Cott could make good on his threat to hurt Reid."

"I agree Aaron," Rossi held up his hand to stop Hotch. "I'm just saying that we're all vulnerable to being fooled because of our connection as a team. Rossi moved down the row of pictures, his face almost as hard to read as Hotch.

"Rossi's right," Morgan said. "We should have seen this. It was right under our noses. Stern fits the profile like a glove.

"Look… we don't have time for doubts and recriminations." Emily said wearily.

"She's right," Hotch agreed picking up his file folder. "Let's talk about victimology," Emily winced and Morgan flexed his hand into a fist.

"Why JJ…" Hotch asked?

"Stern carried around a picture of her mother. He's been obsessed with a dead woman for twenty five years." Morgan added.

"Sheila Benjamin was his last victim, or the last victim that was found. He tried to grab her and didn't account for JJ being there. He lost control of the situation. Why?" Rossi asked. They were all sitting around the metal table again.

"He knew she had a kid, so why didn't he account for that when he went after her." Morgan wondered.

"I don't know, Stern told us that she worked for an old trusting couple in the family diner. He knew her routine; something had to happen to have happened to that to change." Hotch added.

"I agree," Rossi said.

"Well… she's JJ. She's always been a determined and kick butt woman, maybe as a four year old she was more than he could handle." Emily said thinking of Hope and how that little girl inherited her mother's energy.

They all laughed briefly and it was a mournful sound like clapping your hands in a grave yard. "What will she do now?" Rossi asked, unnecessarily.

"She'll give him a hell of a surprise if she can." Emily said and this time they all smiled.

Morgan's phone rang and they listened to him talk to his wife with none of their usual flirting. Even marriage hadn't dampened their enthusiasm for banter. All it took to put out that fire was JJ missing. He spoke quietly to her for a long time and wrote down some information.

"Ok baby girl… Yeah… tell him we'll find her. Yeah… I know… but he has to stay put. I know… just do what you have to do."

He hung up the phone and noticed them all staring at him. "Reid's freaking out."

"I don't blame him." Emily said softly, thinking of Hope and how she was going to react if her mother never came home.

_Stop thinking like that, your friend is going to be okay!_

"Well… he needs to stay put, Hope needs him now?" Hotch said thoughtfully, wondering how he'd tell Jack if anything ever happened to Haley.

Morgan cleared his throat, "Garcia found a cabin for Stern just outside the town limits." He was popping up off his heels in excitement. The team headed out the door with several deputies in tow, after donning vests and checking weapons.

Emily followed the men and hoped they found JJ in this cabin. The thoughts that were chasing themselves around in her head were distracting, but she couldn't banish them. When she'd met JJ the younger woman had seemed friendly and outgoing with a lot of energy. Emily always saw JJ as someone in control and impossible to ruffle. Then Georgia had happened and Emily had seen the sensitive and vulnerable side of her friend. Emily was sick to think that JJ was in the hands of a man who'd been killing for years.

The ride was short and long at the same time. They had to navigate a dirt road five miles outside of the town limits. It was a bumpy two miles, but the cabin came into sight. It was a small building, built from logs like and old-fashioned settlers' home. The logs were silvery grey with age and there were two shuttered windows in front and a sloping roof.

They exited the vehicles and separated to cover the building. Emily went with two detectives to the back of the building. The crackling of their feet in the fallen leaves and grasses sounded like gunshots to her. The trees were standing close together and there wasn't a back door. She would have to wait for the others to clear the building.

The building was cleared quickly and by the looks on Hotch and Rossi's face, Emily knew that JJ wasn't there. How close had it been, how long ago had her friend been there hoping they'd come for her?

They met up inside the cabin. Hotch was angrier than Emily had ever seen him. "Ok… let's take this place apart." He ordered.


	9. I want my mama

_A/n hey all, here's the next chapter. I'm so grateful for all your support, whether through reviews or pms or adding this to your alerts._

_Disclaimer: As always I don't own CM. Maybe someone will give me Reid for Christmas?_

_**I want my mama! **_

JJ did as she was told and put her shoes on. The Sheriff pulled out his handcuffs and told her to put them on. She didn't complain. It wouldn't do her any good. He wasn't listening to her anyway. His eyes were watching her every move, but she was sure that he wasn't seeing her at all.

She snapped the cuffs into place and the metallic sound was like a gunshot in her ears. He was going to take her to wherever he'd taken her mother. She was going to die, she was sure of it, as sure as she was of her love for Spencer.

Spencer… she had to find a way out of this for him and for Hope. She would not be a victim again, not this time.

"Hurry up…" He strode forward and yanked her to her feet. There had to be something she could do, some kind of trail she could leave. Think JJ… think…

He kept the gun on her and made her walk out of the cabin and get into his car. They drove back to the state highway and down about another three miles. She kept her eyes on the trip meter as he drove. If she could keep track of where they were going…

He pulled the car off the road, and got out to move several large pine tree branches that were blocking what was little more than a trail. He pulled the car in about one hundred yards from the road and got out to put the branches back. She wondered if anyone could see the car through that camouflage.

She couldn't get out of the car and run, but as soon as he left the vehicle she began to look around for anything to use as a weapon. She'd show him that cuffing her hands in front of her had been a mistake. She opened the glove compartment, but no gun was there.

_Ok… this isn't a movie of the week, it won't be that easy. _

She heard branches and grass crunching outside the car. He was coming back. There had to be something. Her heart was pounding so hard she was getting dizzy. Her hands were sweating and… There was a pen on the floor half hidden by the floor mat.

_You're not MacGyver, what do you think your going to do with that, build a bomb with the ink and chewing gum? _

She picked up the pen and shoved it into her front pocket. Maybe she wasn't like that guy on television, but she'd find away.

"Get out of the car Jennifer. It's time for you to see your new home." He opened the passenger side door and pulled her out.

She looked around and couldn't see the road. The sky was barely visible through all the trees, and she could smell and feel the woods all around her. He pushed her forward and her mother's voice began to scream in her head again.

Dizziness and nausea threatened to overtake her, but he pushed her on telling her that it was ok. He said he would take care of her. He said that Reid didn't really love her, and sooner or later he would leave her and Hope.

"Why should he care about your little girl? He's not her true father, is he?" He said as though he knew.

But how could he know. He had to have been watching her for a long time. New shivers ran up her spine and sweat beaded up on her forehead. How could she win against someone that knew her so well? He even knew about the rape.

_Mama… Help me!_

It was the voice of a child in her head. It was her voice, but her mother couldn't help her now. Her mother was dead. Yes… her mother was dead and it was time to take action. She began to work the pen out of her pants pocket.

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Reid opened the door to JJ's office and pushed the stroller into the room. He cut off the sound of Hope's wails that pushed into the hallway, by shutting the door with a snap. His hands were shaking with rage and grief.

"Mama… me want mama!" Hope gasped out; her little face was bright red.

Reid picked her up and collapsed into his wife's chair. "Pwease dada go bye-bye… me want see mama now," Hope demanded.

"No!" He said much louder than he'd intended and Hope began to wail again. She squirmed in his arms and his conscience began lecturing him.

"I'm sorry princess," He whispered into her hair. The smell of her that had been so soothing to him earlier in the day was making him sick now.

Hope was a part of JJ, the only part he'd have left if JJ didn't come back to him. In spite of the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach, he cuddled her girl closer to his heart and rocked in the chair, while Hope cried for her mother.

"Mama will be home soon baby. I promise." He stood, and paced up and down the small room with her in his arms.

The office seemed a lot smaller than usual, but the only way to calm Hope was to get his own emotions under control, and the only way to do that was for him to work over the problem and figure out the answer. There were several books he'd read that said children were sensitive to the moods of the parents and siblings.

So he let the case continue to race around and around in his head. He shifted Hope a bit. She was calming down. Her thumb had gone back into her mouth, and she was watching his face intently as he muttered to himself.

_Wonderful now the poor girl was traumatized. _

He sat down again and rubbed her back in little circles. She hiccupped and raised her head to look at him. Her eyes, that were exactly like her mother's, nearly broke his heart. How could he get through this with JJ's eyes looking into his with such a questioning light?

She pulled her thumb out of her mouth and regarded him for a long moment, "Dada, me scared."

"I know princess. Daddy's scared too, but everyone will be okay." He went back to stroking her silky soft hair.

"Want Mo," Hope said, sniffing a bit.

He found a tissue in the diaper bag and wiped her face and nose. He took her Elmo doll out of her stroller and handed it to her. She didn't complain when he put her in the stroller. She began to babble quietly to her doll. She seemed to be ok, but Reid wondered. How many traumas could a child take before they suffered irreparable damage?

Reid knew the damage that could be done from the loss of a parent or two. His father had left and his mother had just gone away into her own mind.

Damn it. He had to find the answer. Hope wasn't going to lose her mother; he'd make sure of that no matter what it took.

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Emily and Morgan were in the small room off the living room in the cabin. CSI had been called in and they were working the scene as fast as they could.

"They were here," Emily said, looking around the room desperately hoping to find something, anything to find her friend.

"Yeah… I think they were." Morgan replied. He too was searching the room and trying not to stumble over the CSIs and Emily.

"So he's been active in the area for twenty five years. He takes females that resemble JJ. There were victims before JJ's mother and precedence tells us that these offenders choose their victims based on something that happened to them in the past. He had an abusive mother, or sister, a girlfriend that rejected him." Morgan thought out loud.

"Right… we need to know what happened to him to understand his ritual. He raped his victims and he's married so he isn't impotent. Their hands were cut off. Why the hands," Emily asked?

"I'd say he was abused by a mother or sister." Morgan speculated. "Cutting off their hands is a symbol of success. What's that saying? A self-made man or woman! That implies the use of your hands."

Morgan's phone rang and he moved out of the cabin and into the late afternoon sunshine of the forest. The smell of pine was fresh and crisp and he wondered if JJ could smell it too. There was a slight breeze that should have been cool on his skin, instead it made goose bumps pop up on his arms.

The name on his call display made him smile and the goose bumps got worse. Little bursts of pleasure began to erupt in his belly. "Hey gorgeous…" He rumbled happily into the phone. "How's my personal love goddess?"

"_Hey Derek…"_

"She's going to be ok Pen. We'll find her." Morgan said to her unspoken question.

"_I know JJ can take care of herself, but what if she can't?"_

"Mama… we're doing everything we can. You know I can't let my man down. He needs JJ and Hope needs her mother."

"_That's why I'm so worried. She's like my sister. I love her like we're the same blood. Reid loves her with his whole soul. What if she…"_

"Penelope don't go there, when we get her back, you and I will take them out to dinner… ok?"

"_Ok… I just can't stand to see the look on his face. I know he wants to come to Pennsylvania." _

"So you told him," Morgan asked already know the answer.

_"Yeah baby… You should have seen the look on his face. It was like someone had killed him. He got all dead in the eyes. I haven't seen him look like that since he got back from Georgia and he was doing drugs." _

"He'll keep it together, you know he will." Morgan said, hoping that he wasn't lying to her. "Hotch wants him to stay at Quantico. Hope needs him."

"_I know, but I don't know if he'll stay." _

"I have faith in your ability to keep him there."

"_I hope you're right. Now I have some information for you. I pulled up all the information I could find on Adam Stern. His mother died in 1985, just about six months before the first victim was found. She was beaten within an inch of her life. She was killed at home. It looked like someone broke in and robbed her. Stern was checked out, but he had an alibi. He was in training with the police academy at the time. His girlfriend claimed he was with her the entire night. It was a shaky alibi at best. They couldn't find any evidence to tie him to the murder, so it's remained unsolved to this day. _

_I found hospital records that indicate he was in and out of care as a child. He had a broken fingers, ribs, an ankle, Etc. It's a classic pattern of abuse, but at the time, there were no computers to tie things together and the doctors weren't looking for patterns._

_He's lived in Marienville for the last twenty- seven years since graduating the academy. He's been decorated several times for heroism. If he's a psycho, how come no one saw it before now?"_

"He's that good baby girl." Morgan told her a suspicion beginning to form in his head. "You got anything else for me?"

"_Nope… I'm still working on it. I'll call you back."_

"Thanks mama," He said.

"Just bring your beautiful self back to me." She demanded before hanging up on him.

He smiled at the phone and thanked God she was safe in the BAU. No one could get to her there and he could leave her there knowing she'd be ok. How did JJ and Reid do the whole sharing the field job?

He went back into the cabin to let the others know what he'd found out.

He was just entering the cabin when Hotch called out for them. He and Emily went back into the bedroom with Rossi. The CSI were taking up a loose rock in the stone floor. Apparently one of them had almost tripped over it.

Hotch shone his flashlight into the floor and the light fell on something in the hole. He reached in, ignoring the protestations of his teammates and pulled out a thick book. It had a maroon cover. It was leather and had no name on the spine.

Hotch opened the book to the first page that was brown and lined with age. The others had gathered around him like a group of ten year old kids ready to take a blood oath. Morgan looked up at Hotch and said. "Well… it looks like we found some answers!"


	10. The pieces begin to come together

_A/n hey everyone. Since the site wouldn't cooperate all day you get a bonus chapter. Thanks for all your reviews and personal messages. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything from CM, but I'm holding out hope for Christmas._

_**The pieces begin to come together. **_

Reid leaned back in JJ's office chair and sighed. The headache forming behind his eyes and across the back of his neck was shaping up to be a skull cracker. He pinched the bridge of his nose and looked at the files spread around the desk. There was something he was missing. He was sure of it. What kind of genius couldn't see the patterns that had to exist in all of the data in front of him?

_The kind of genius that was working on a case involving his wife… _

Well… picturing JJ as the victim of a serial killer wasn't helping his concentration at all. He shouldn't be on this case, his objectivity was severely compromised. If he couldn't be objective, how was he going to find Adam Stern and JJ?

Think Reid! What would you look at if you were on any other case? A common link, that's what you'd look for. There's always a common link, besides the blond hair and blue eyes, age and personality type. Garcia hadn't been able to find any other victims in the intervening time. He had to have been active between the eighties and now. Reid was sure that there were others, but for some reason he hid the bodies and now he was back out in the open.

Allegheny County was a very remote location and it would be easy to lose a body there. Ted Bundy had hidden some of his victims in the Rocky Mountains and some of them were never found. Maybe Adam Stern had done the same thing. He didn't want to be caught, why? Now he'd changed his mind. Okay he had JJ and from what he found out from the team, JJ's mother was the last victim twenty five years ago. JJ was a loose end that had to be tied up, that's why he'd taken her. Finding her wouldn't be easy in thousands of acres. Ok… don't lose hope you have the help of the best profilers in the world, you'll get her back for you and for Hope.

He put the files in chronological order beginning with Adam Stern's mother. All the women were vacationing in the town of Marienville when they disappeared. None of the victims had ties to the town. The police reports showed that all the women had stayed at the same motel. Why hadn't that been checked out more thoroughly, there was nothing but check in and check out dates and interviews with the owner? The name of the Inn was the Boars Head Inn. The place was run by Joseph Freeman. The police had questioned the owner but the man had solid alibis for all of the disappearances.

The dates of the murders all corresponded with the beginning of the spring season, from the first of April to the first of June. All of the women had come to the town with friends. They all had plans to go hiking the trail. The most recent victim had been found at the starting point where all the victims in the eighties had last been seen.

All the groups had started out ok, but somehow on the second or third night the selected victim was taken. It had to be some kind of ruse. Adam Stern was a cop, he could think up something to get to them. He fooled JJ so it was possible. Anything from telling them a loved one was in trouble to… well anything would work. How was he getting them alone? Did he just show up and they went with him because of his position with the Sheriff's department. Did Adam Stern have help?

He looked over at Hope. She was sitting on the floor playing with some toys he'd brought with him. Her blankie was nearby and she seemed happy for the moment.

He went back to the case files and the dates of the trips. The women had hiked a certain trail with friends and were found at different places. He got up and was half way out the door when he remembered Hope was in the room.

"Sorry princess…" He picked her up and she giggled when he tickled her ribs. "Daddy's not used to having Hope at work."

"Me wuv dada," She threw her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. A big lump formed in this throat at her impulsive affection. Tears began forming in his eyes. He had to get JJ back, Hope needed her mother, and he needed his wife.

"Thank you sweetie," He stopped when his voice broke a little. "Daddy loves Hope too." He kissed her fore head and she giggled, the sound was a happy and carefree sound that tore at his heart.

He left the office and hurried down the hallway to Garcia's office. She saw working away at her computers, one of them beeped as soon as Reid walked into the room.

"Son of a bitch," She exclaimed!

"'itch," Hope parroted and then she giggled. Garcia whirled around in her chair looking completely harried.

"You want to watch your language Garcia?" Reid asked trying to be serious, but the need for a laugh was too great.

"Cute… I don't think I'm the only one she's heard use words like that." Garcia flung back at him, but her face was a little pink as she looked at Hope. She turned back to her babies.

"Hey… I don't use language like that," Reid insisted only half seriously.

"I wasn't talking about you, I meant JJ!" Garcia said distractedly.

"I'm going to tell her you said that," Reid promised.

"Yeah… yeah, I'm scared. Now pay attention sweet thing. I've got an idea."

Reid sat down next to Garcia and winced when Hope yanked on his hair. "Really… I have an idea too!"

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Hotch, Morgan and Emily gathered around the rough hewn table in the kitchen of the cabin. "This is a detailed account of all his kills." Hotch threw the leather bound book down on the table.

"There are pictures, descriptions of all the torture and the rapes. He's got some kind of souvenirs, locks of hair, jewelry some drivers' licenses." Hotch continued.

"So… it's true… he's the one that's behind all of this." Emily said, with a tone that said she didn't want to believe it and acknowledge the fact that her friend was in the hands of a sociopath.

"God Damn it! He's going to do the same thing to JJ isn't he?" Morgan said slamming a hand down on the table.

"He says here that Sheila Benjamin reminded him of his mom from when he was a very small child. He believed that he was in love with her too." Rossi was reading from about halfway through the book.

"These guys don't love." Morgan said. "They aren't capable of those kinds of emotional attachments.

"I know… but he thinks he was. I've read the Frank Breitkopf file and Stern reminds me of him. He had to kill Shelia. He wanted Sheila to stay with him even if she didn't want to. He saw Sheila and JJ as a family. When he lost control of that situation, it ruined the fantasy and there was always the possibility that JJ would remember him and what happened to her mother." Rossi said while reading the entry.

"JJ is a substitute for her mother. You've seen the picture of Shelia that Stern carries around with him. She looks almost exactly like JJ." Hotch said. He took the book from Rossi and began to search through it again.

"Here… it's dated about three years ago. He was in DC for a seminar on anger excitation given by the BAU if you can believe it." Hotch showed them the entry and saw the disbelief he felt mirrored in all their eyes.

"Isn't that particular lecture Reid's specialty, he gives that seminar all the time." Emily said, feeling a chill enter the deepest parts of her heart.

"Yes," Hotch said, putting the book down again.

"So… what he met Reid and saw JJ and decided it was fate telling him to take her just like he did her mother all of those years ago." Morgan asked a bit skeptically.

"He says that on the last day of the seminar he met Reid. Apparently JJ was in town and came to the seminar so they could go to lunch or something he thought. He didn't actually meet her; he just saw her and knew he had to have her for his own." Hotch summarized what he'd read.

Morgan had grabbed the thick book and was flipping through it again. "He's talks about this cabin and also a cave in the woods south of here. There are no directions there. I guess that would be too easy." He threw it down and got up to pace angrily around the room.

"Morgan we have to calm down, we're not going to help JJ by losing out heads." Emily said to him. She put a hand on his arm and he didn't snap at her, even though he wanted to. He wanted to get his hands on Adam Stern so badly, he could nearly taste it.

His phone beeped at the same time as a CSI came out of the bedroom and motioned to Hotch. He went back outside the cabin into the late afternoon sunshine. "Hey baby girl! Please tell me you've got some good news for me."

"_Yeah gorgeous… Reid and I think we might have found out where he took JJ." _

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The sun was beginning to descend into the horizon. The trees were blocking its rays with their branches, and it looked the way she remembered it from passing out earlier that day. She had taken the pen out of her pocket, but she didn't know what to do with it. Think JJ, you've seen enough television you should be able to come up with something. Yeah… maybe in the comfort of her living room with Spence next to her, spouting off about how a bomb made from chewing gum and a rubber band couldn't possibly work. She could see him in her minds eye looking very serious about the whole thing, while she laughed and Hope played with her toys.

The snapping of branches and the crackling of grass and leaves under her feet reminded her that she wasn't at home with her beloved daughter and Spence. It wouldn't do to check out and pretend. Then she felt the gun that Adam Stern had pressing into her back.

"Pick up the pace Jenny. It's getting dark, and believe me when I tell you that you don't want to be out here after the sun goes down."

He was whispering in her ear and she shivered. If he took her too far into these woods, she might never find her way out again. A bird screamed from overhead and she jumped. Her foot came down on a tree root and she fell.

"Get up Jenny. I don't have time for this." She rolled over as his hand came down on her arm. He yanked her back to her feet.

"Don't play with me. I know what happened to you three years ago. I did my homework. That beautiful little girl of yours isn't the flesh and blood child of Dr. Reid. He doesn't deserve either of you. I'll find a way to get Hope and all of us will be a family. Stop fighting against that and just give in. I can protect you and your daughter the way your mother wouldn't let me. I love you Jennifer, more than Dr. Reid ever will."

"No!" She shouted. "I won't let you touch my daughter." She swung her hands up and rammed the business end of the pen into the corner of one of his eyes. He screamed and thrashed, knocking her to the ground again as the gun went off.


	11. It's over!

_A/n I'm so please with all the positive reaction to this story and the honest feedback from you. Here is the last chapter. Thanks again to you all and to my wonderful beta REIDFANATIC_

_Disclaimer: Lady Scarlet said she would give me Reid for Christmas. I hope that's not a copyright infringement!_

_**It's over! **_

"Don't play with me. I know what happened to you three years ago. I did my homework. That beautiful little girl of yours isn't the flesh and blood child of Dr. Reid. He doesn't deserve either of you. I'll find a way to get Hope and all of us will be a family. Stop fighting against that and just give in. I can protect you and your daughter the way your mother wouldn't let me. I love you Jennifer, more than Dr. Reid ever will."

"No!" She shouted. "I won't let you touch my daughter." She swung her hands up and rammed the business end of the pen into one of his eyes.

He screamed and thrashed knocking her to the ground again. The gun went off with a deafening crash, and she shook her head to clear it. Stern was on the ground. Was he dead? Where was the gun? She looked around frantically. She had to get control of the gun and then she'd worry about Stern.

The gun, there it was under a pine tree, the last rays of light shining off the barrel like a beacon. She stumbled to it and knelt to pick it up in her handcuffed hands. The grip of the gun was still warm from the hands of the Sheriff and she almost threw up. There was a moan behind her and she whirled around. Stern was struggling to his feet.

"Give me the gun little girl." He gasped.

The light was getting so faint, she couldn't tell if he was shot, but there was blood running down his face from contact with the pen. She trained the gun on him with shaking hands. The blood oozing out of the corner of his left eye was black in the fading light.

"You won't shoot me darlin,' put it down and all is forgiven, I promise." He sounded so sincere and caring over his hard and labored breathing that she lowered the gun just a bit.

"That's right girl, just give me the gun."

She lifted the barrel again and cocked the revolver. "Stay back… I'm a federal office and you're under arrest for assaulting a federal officer, kidnapping a federal officer and at least seven counts of first degree murder." Her voice was shaking so badly as to be nearly incomprehensible. "Toss me the keys to these cuffs." She demanded and he laughed.

She pulled the trigger and the shot went over his head. He stopped where he was, swaying on the spot. "Give me the keys, now!" She screamed.

He pulled them out of his pocket and tossed them to her. They arced through the air and fell almost at her feet.

"Stay where you are!" She insisted when he tried to step forward. She bent down trying to keep an eye on him and grab the keys.

"Take it easy Jenny. You know I truly love you." He rushed her, when she grabbed the keys. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion after that. She looked up and saw him rushing her; she swung the gun up and pulled the trigger.

He went down and stayed down that time. She could only stand there and look at him. What if he moved again, what if he was still alive and came after her again. It was like a horror movie where the killer kept coming back again and again.

The keys to the cuffs were hanging from one fist, she hadn't dropped them. It was the hardest thing she'd ever done, but she put the gun down and fumbled with the keys in the near dark till the cuffs dropped off. She grabbed the gun again and went to check on Stern.

"_Stay away from him Jenny. Run far away." _

It was her mother's voice in her head. "I can't mommy. I have to make sure."

She didn't realize that she was talking to herself in a voice quite like Hope. She edged toward the Sheriff on weak legs. Her heart was pounding and her hands were so sweaty she almost dropped the gun.

"_You're weak just like all women. Adam Stern and men like me always win whether you kill us or not." _

Michael Van Cott spoke up in her head and she began to shake and stopped dead in her tracks just inches from the Sheriff's head. The sky was completely purple and dark blue. It was getting dark fast. She had to get back to the car. She took a few deep breaths and when Michael Van Cott's voice awoke in her head again she kicked Stern's shoulder. She leapt back as thought scalded by hot water at the contact with his body.

He didn't move and she knelt down to feel for a pulse on his neck. One hand still pointed the gun at him and that hand was still shaking like a leaf in a hard spring storm. His neck was still warm, but there was no pulse. He was finally dead!

She reached around his belt and pulled a flashlight from it. It clicked on strong and bright. She flashed the light around and it found frightened bird on the branch of an American elm tree. It flew away chirping loudly. It was time to get back to the car. She left the Sheriff where he lay, holding the gun in front of her with the flash light bobbing in her shaking hands.

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"Ok… here's what I found. I added all the information you gave me from the murders twenty-five years ago and the murder yesterday. I was able to put a together a geographical profile. The bodies were all found in a twelve mile radius from the cabin of the hermit that found JJ's mother, to the first victim found three miles north of the cabin where the guys found his journal." Garcia's face looked like she'd just sucked on a lemon and Reid wanted to laugh in spite of the situation. "So what I found was a series of caves right there." She pointed to the map that was up on her screen.

"I think that's his hideaway. There used to be an old mine shaft up there as well and a very old trail. It's marked on the topographical map I have. It's exactly three miles on Route 66 from Stern's cabin. I have no idea if it's even visible from the highway. "Garcia finished.

"Well… there's no need for me obviously." Reid said with a sad smile.

"You came to the same conclusion," Garcia asked her eyes twinkling in anticipation of calling the team.

"Yeah… I mean it was all there, the routes the women took with there hiking groups and where all the girls were found. I knew there had to be a place in the center of it all where he was taking them. It's so remote that if he used the mine shaft they could scream their lungs out and no one would hear them."

"I don't care how you thought of it, we need to call in the team and let them know." She said punching a familiar speed dial button on her phone.

"Hey sugar… Reid and I have some news for you."

Reid looked down at Hope. He wanted to leave her with Garcia and go find JJ himself, but he knew that by the time he got to where they were it would be all over. He wanted to stay with Hope and take care of his little girl. It was like the dream, a conflict so strong it was pulling his heart apart. He had to trust the team. They'd find her, but he wanted to be the one to find her. He wanted to pull her into his arms and tell her that everything was alright.

"Where mama," Hope asked rubbing at her eyes. "Me want mama!"

"Mama will be home very soon princess I promise." God… he hoped he wasn't promising her something that he couldn't produce. What if JJ wasn't in that area? How many caves were there, how many would the team have to search before they found her? What if she angered Stern, or he got impatient, or scared and killed her. He felt tears starting in his eyes and he blinked them back hard. He couldn't cry in front of Hope, he didn't want to scare her.

"Mama," She cried. She kept rubbing at her eyes. He left the office as Garcia was still talking excitedly to Morgan.

They went back to his wife's office and he sat back down in JJ's chair. It took a long time but Hope finally went to sleep. She was exhausted from the day and he didn't blame her. He got up and put her carefully in the stroller. He'd sit and he'd wait just as she'd had to wait to find him when Tobias Henkel had taken him in Georgia. She'd be home soon. Why was waiting so much harder than just being out there working. It was a question his genius couldn't answer, not even for Hope.

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"Garcia just called. She gave me the location of a series of caves and a mine shaft exactly three miles from here on Route 66." He told them. He explained what she and Reid had come up with and they agreed it was a place to start. It was nearly dark when they left the cabin, and got back to the SUVs at the road side.

Hotch took the lead vehicle and watching his trip meter stopped exactly three miles down the road from where they started. His headlights didn't show anything but trees. Where was this old road Garcia had told him about? The other vehicles pulled up behind him and they all got out and looked around, flashlights shining in the darkness of the night.

"Look over there." Rossi said pointing in front of them.

"What do you see Dave," Hotch asked?

"Right there, the road is blocked by tree branches, right there and there." He pointed with his flashlight. "My dad had a cabin, and the road was blocked this way when we weren't there instead of a locked gate." He told them as he and Morgan and Hotch moved the branches.

Several Marienville cops pulled up as they were clearing out the road. One shined his light in and saw Sterns car sitting in the clearing. "Son of a bitch," He exclaimed! "I'm sorry I didn't think you guys were right, that it had to be some kind of joke but here we are." He said to Rossi and Hotch.

"Don't worry son. He fooled a lot of people for a very long time." Rossi said generously.

They proceeded into the interior of the clearing, and began to look around to see which way Stern and JJ might have gone.

"Look over here," Morgan said. "I found a couple sets of footprints." He said shining his light excitedly at the marks on the ground.

"Ok, let's get going. We can -"

There was crackling noise from up the trail and a bobbing flashlight. "Who's there," Hotch shouted. This is the FBI, identify yourself now!" He shouted.

The flashlight stopped moving then a voice shouted back. "It's me… It's JJ."

"JJ… Are you okay?" Morgan called back as Emily ran up the trail to meet her friend.

"Yes… I'm fine. The Sheriff is dead. I had no choice, I had to kill him!"

Emily threw her arms around their friend and hugged her. "Are you ok," she asked pointedly and quietly?

"Yeah… I'm ok Emily I promise." She started to cry and Emily helped her down the hillside. The whole team hugged her in turn, even Rossi.

"I want to go home. I want to see my daughter, can we please go home." She pleaded with Hotch. "I'll tell you everything you want to know tomorrow, but I want to go home and forget this place.

Hotch nodded, "We'll wrap this up as fast as we can JJ." He hugged her again and then let Emily lead her down to the SUV.

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The big clock over the mantle piece read two seventeen when JJ entered the house. She stopped to wave at Emily, who'd driven her home. The entryway was silent and the light was dimmed to near dark. She looked to her left and saw that it was dark. The chocolate leather couch in front of her faced the big screen television that faced her. She could see Spencer's head on one armrest of the couch.

He was asleep when she tip-toed over to the other side of the couch. He lay on the couch with Hope sprawled out on top of him. They both looked so peaceful. She breathed in the scent of home and family like a dying man takes his last breath.

"You're home," Reid said startling her into looking down at him. He was blinking in the low light, but he had a big grin on his face.

"Yeah I just got here." She said.

Hope twitched and then turned toward JJ, her eyes opening slowly. "Mama home," She clamored off of Reid and jumped into JJ's arms.

The lump that had been forming in JJ's throat burst and she began to cry. Reid got to his feet and hugged them both fiercely. This wasn't going to happen again. He would make sure it didn't, he couldn't bear to lose either of them.

He soothed her as best as he could, but the truth was that his emotions were all jumbled up and he didn't trust himself to speak much.

"I'm so glad your ok. I love you so much JJ." He said into her neck.

"Dada queeze me," Hope wriggled between them and they both laughed.

"Sorry baby." He moved away from JJ who'd got her tears under control.

"Come on little girl, it's time to go to bed." She walked away from the couch with a protesting Hope.

"No go night-night. I not tired." Hope complained.

She rubbed at her eyes and JJ laughed through her tears. "I think you are baby."

She entered the nursery and got Hope into her pajamas with butterflies all over them. She sat with the girl in her arms in the glider rocker and after several minutes Hope was asleep. She put her daughter in her crib, but she didn't want to leave. She missed her little girl so much, how could she go to her room and leave her baby.

After half an hour of watching she felt her eyes beginning to close. It had been such a long day and her head hurt so much. And there was Spencer, he was waiting for her, she needed to see him and feel the touch of his hands.

She shut out the lights and made sure the Mickey Mouse night light was on and the baby monitor. She left the door open a bit for Spencer's sake and went down the hallway to her bedroom. She found Spencer where she knew he would be, curled up in the big arm chair in one corner of the room.

"Hey…" He said, holding out his arms.

She bolted into his lap and cried as he held onto her. He didn't say anything at all; he just held her in his arms and stroked her hair till she quieted.

"I was so afraid you weren't coming back," He said in a tear-filled voice.

"I'm sorry," She said, her heart beginning to stop its frantic beating in her ribcage.

"Why… none of this is your fault. I talked to Morgan he told me everything. I'm just sorry this is how you had to find out the truth."

"I'm glad I know. It makes it better. I thought I'd never understand why I hated the woods and now I know it's because of Stern. I don't remember what happened those hours I was alone in the woods as a little girl, and I don't want to remember, some things are better left buried." She said cutting off what he started to say.

"I don't want to remember or talk to a shrink about it. I want to forget and be happy with you and Hope. Please Spence, just hold me till tomorrow, we'll talk in the morning… please baby."

She got up and took of the dirty blouse and slacks she wore while he disrobed and got into bed. He held her, he made love to her and when she slept and woke screaming from new nightmares he told her it would be okay, and he hoped with all his heart that it would be alright, this time.

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Epilogue

They didn't go to Pennsylvania for Memorial Day weekend. It was Hope's birthday and although JJ understood the reason her aunt had lied to her, she wasn't ready to forgive her just yet.

Instead, they had a birthday party for Hope at the Reids. Emily, Morgan and Garcia were there; Hotch and Rossi had other plans, but had sent gifts. Garcia confided in Reid that she and Morgan were trying to get pregnant; apparently JJ's kidnapping had changed his mind about having a baby.

Reid and Garcia were in the kitchen cutting the cake and getting drinks for everyone. There would be another party for Hope and her friends the next weekend.

"So… you finally got Morgan to agree to kids." Reid asked.

"Yeah… he said that if you can do it, then so can he." She grinned at him.

"I think it's more than him just competing with me." Reid said, digging ice cream out of its container and dropping it on a plate for Emily.

"Yeah… he doesn't say it, but I think the possibility of JJ not coming back freaked him out. He realizes how important family is."

"He always knew that, he just needed a prod." Reid told her, cutting another piece of cake for Morgan.

"What are you two talking about in here?" Morgan asked as he leaned against the wall.

"Yeah… get the lead out!" JJ said walking over to give Reid a hug. She never stayed far away from him anymore, unless work forced it.

He pinched her backside and she yelped. "Good one Reid." Morgan said approvingly.

They took the dessert back to the table and JJ thought as they ate that she didn't fear the woods any longer. There were other things more important to fear, like the loss of her family, which included her BAU family. God willing she'd never have to know what that was like!


End file.
